The Blurred Lines Between Mental Illness and Spiritual Awakening

I was a teenager when one rainy evening while on a bus going home, I suddenly heard a male voice say,

“Ring the bell get off the bus and run.”

Astonished at the clarity of this voice and the command, I looked around but there was no one close to me as there was about only four of us there and different from the bus driver the others were at the back of the bus.

This voice and command came twice more, but I did not get off. I remember my heart fluttering and panic almost set in. But I silently begged my mind to settle. I thought of Mad Marie, my mother’s friend’s daughter who was a teacher in Jamaica and Mama said because she was brilliant, people had obeah her and turned her into a stark raving lunatic. What was happening to me? All of this was buzzing around in my head, but I waited until I got to my stop to get off, speedily walking home in the rain and silently crying.

I did not want to be Mad Marie, hoity toity, speaky spokey but mad as a hatter! A lunatic in clean clothes and a masters degree. God in heaven help me was my thoughts– I remember that evening clearly.

This experience rallied in several other mysterious happening through out my youth that spiraled me into depression thinking I was losing my mind.

Looking back, those days were hell for me, for I had no idea that I was being shaken awake. I was stirred when I was younger so subtly that I did not notice then, but hearing the command clearly on the bus that day, I was being shifted into becoming me.

The awakening can be brutal. In fact most people are jarred awake so hard they will seem as if they are losing their minds. Imagine me telling people back then that a voice spoke to me and told me to run? Even I would side eye myself and slowly back away, fearing a bite. I was wise enough to suffer that fear in silence. That fear was the usurper of my life back then, boy did it do a job.

Then I woke up, it was gradual but here am I.

But not all appearances of mental illness is what it seems! Let me tell you.

It can be frightening when the forces that are beyond our world decide to interact with lowly humans. And if the human “wakes up” too quickly, it can affect the human mind and send him or her off their mental track.

They have to be prepared first or else such an experience can disturb the mind and throw them off alignment. And that is when other humans begin to perceive them as very eccentric or down right crazy.

Kanye West is a good example of this– He has risen to a level of mental development that is beyond what we consider to be “normal”, beyond the ordinary human consciousness, like looking in to a great bubble in which the world seems to be huddled together, and you can’t get back in, nor do they even realize that such a bubble existed…..but then again Geminis can be strange and I personally like them, both their sides and they like me.

I was told an interesting story by one of my bloggers, who I will refer to as “Mary”. I can not share everything because it’s about 4 pages long, but she sent me an email one day, where she thanked me for this blog and how it has helped her. She told me that she had been diagnosed with Bi-Polar disorder, which furrowed my brow, because the email up until then was delightful, but the ending made me sad.

(For all the initiates or the ones who have real metaphysical knowledge please pay attention to certain keywords in this letter and I implore you to give me your two cents on what you find. Zion Revival people where are you? I am sounding the trumpet, respond o!!)

This is part of what she told me:

"Towards the end of 2019, I found your blog and read a lot of new information. As I digested the information, I felt like I found something new that I could relate and was drawn to, but also something I knew nothing about. Overthinking led to paranoia and I was scared about some of the things I was reading and how it pertained to my life and my family. I also wanted to tell everyone about the new information and make changes to my life immediately. 

Maybe a week before my first episodeI read about  manifestation. I followed the instructions and the next thing you know I had job offers, which is what I asked for. I experienced synchronicity and things happening that I hadn't experienced before.

Two days before my first episode, I went to a spiritual event hosted by a woman named Amisa (not her real name). She holds classes for women to unlock their spiritual potential and increase their knowledge about the power they have within. There, she had a drink that she made on her own which I drank a lot of, so much that the other ladies there told me to slow down because the stuff was strong.

That night my ears started popping. I began to have multiple Aha! light bulb moments in my head. I told my then boyfriend that me and him were working for Bob Marley and I sent him heart from every color of the rainbow. I felt like I was on a very important mission. During this time a span of a few days it felt like a bunch of waves came over me. At one point, I thought that I was Jesus. [...] Later that night I felt panicked and paranoid, I said that they were coming to get me because I was Jesus Christ.

I went into the kitchen and scanned my bible with my hand as I was reading at lightening speed and something in my head said that what I was reading was in relation to my family. [One night] when I woke up, I lost the ability to speak and was unable to stand when someone talked to me.

[I was then taken to the hospital] and on the way there I saw certain things like signs and numbers that invoked panic and I cried because I felt trouble. At the hospital, the police entered the room and I screamed what they said and felt afraid of him [?]. I was very hostile towards the nurses and they shot me in my arms to make me go to sleep. That was my first episode in February 2020. My grandma came 2 hours from her home to see me and she was dressed in a pink suit. I remember her sitting there and looking at me and saying, "I knew you were special."

Let me stop here because it was a lot, and if you’ve been reading this blog, then you will remember from my own initiation through Spirit that I went through a similar experience as Mary, no hospitals or episodes but aha moments and many revelations albeit gradual. It is very hard for me to recount those times in my life because it was – for lack of a better word – dreadful. Harsh, to say the least.

I have met many very high spiritual people who others may describe as eccentric or odd.

And in many cases, or probably some, people can become awake overnight, which is very horrifying and dangerous.

Now, as you read Mary’s letter, you will see that her first episode began after she attended this event. But there is something peculiar that happened before the event, according to her letter. She had found Embracing Spirituality and was getting a lot of information from here, and then she went to this event, drank a strange drink, and thereafter the episodes began…

I have my own theory as to why she went through this, but I must tell you she went through an Awakening. But a very dangerous one, because all of her spiritual doors were flung wide open, and through those doors marched the Good, the Bad, and Indifferent. By this I mean that Beings from other worlds had access to her mind and all were speaking to her at once. What was peculiar in her finding this blog before attending the event and having this episode? Please comment if you understand why. However she seeking but stumbled after drinking this concotion at the event and had a mental break, an episode.

What would have been a beautiful melodic tune to the one who awakens at a slow and gradual pace, was a horrific noise of twisted screeching and squealing notes.

This is the case for many that are diagnosed Bi-Polar, Schizophrenic, Disassociated Personality, and other diagnosis with scientific terms and spiritually affecting medications and injections. They have no idea that these manic, frantic and wild looking people in straight jackets and padded rooms are actually vibrating at high frequency, so high that ordinary people are not able to understand.

Have you ever had a dream that was a so coded that when you woke up it seemed like a bunch of foolishness? Like running down the road from Big Bird from Sesame Street? But after sharing it with someone with a little more wisdom, they break it down until it suddenly seems so clear?

That apparent chaos is a peek into the mind of the so-called “diagnosed” individuals. But these are true messages from the World of Spirit, but they are convoluted in symbols/codes/metaphors, playing on the internal fears, woes, depression, and those sorrows inherited from the family line.

It is spiritual language.

But what happens when such a person is given an injection or medication to “treat” this “psychosis”?

Ok– an unconscious person is not fully aligned with their consciousness, so when the awakening begins, then the “merge” starts to happen. But it happens slowly, like a big heavy door closing. It can’t be slammed, it has to take its time to come together.

But when it occurs suddenly, when the door is slammed in one force, a slight damage can occur because everything is revealed at once, like giving a small baby a chicken leg to eat.

So when the synthetic drug enters the body, when a mind-altering interference forcefully halts the influx of spiritual revelation, then whatever was aligned before, begins to break apart. Its like pouring water on a computer keyboard. What happens, the computer now becomes damaged.

This is one of the hardest and most dangerous spiritual healings to do for a spiritualist– putting a person’s mind back together again after it has been shattered. Because spiritual doors have been flung opened and pieces of the person’s own consciousness are scattered about in all directions, some no where to be found. Putting them back together again is a long, painful, and dangerous process that can “hit” the spiritualist if he is not strong enough and who ever else is involved in the attempted rescue.

Disclaimer: I am not advocating for people not to take their medication, if you have already been taking it and it works for you and your family. I am not against psychiatry in any way shape or form. I am dealing with the spiritual part of things that happen with the human consciousness.

However, my darlings be careful. There are many people out there who do not know what they are doing and are playing with people’s lives, calling themselves “spiritualists”. Be ye careful.

Depression, anxiety attacks, or other mental health issues comes through one source: Fear. Fear is like the root of a tree and then everything else are only branches of it. But when the root of the tree, which is very hard to move, begins to be uprooted, all the different branches and every fruit it has bore, begins to shake.

When the stirring begins, this is the mark of the Awakening.

In other words, every human being has within them some type of fear. No matter how hidden, and it comes out in many different ways. But when the person begins to go into depression and from there anxiety with panic attacks, it means that this fear is being rooted out. It must be uprooted with so that light/consciousness can enter your life. Pray your way through it.

So no, you are not crazy. You are just beginning to remember who you are.

Obara Meji

PS: This post does not apply to every case. There are some people who inherit some generational curses which appears as lunacy, and there are others who have unleashed negative forces unto themselves, opening portals through their acts, (i.e. dabbling into spiritual work without knowledge is one example, and other examples too much to get into) and thus pays the price.