This is a post sent in by Sharlenerose…..I myself had a similar experience with my childrens father which I will post sometime next week as a follow up to this story, I want to thank you Sharlenerose for bravely sharing your story and personal feelings in order to highlight what you are going through so that others who might be going through the same thing will identify with your story and feel stronger and more confident in dealing with it.
The Complications Of Dating As A Spiritual Female My boyfriend knows I am spiritual. It’s killing our relationship, why, you might ask, because he is a typical Jamaican man and would like to have more than one woman. This will not be able to work with me. What I don’t dream about will walk up and be revealed. He feels like he took on more than he can handle. I at times feel sorry for him because he has chosen me, a being that is not normal. How can he deal with the fact that he cannot just dilly dally with me as he does with his bike. He says my life situation and his is not going to work, yet he is drawn to me and cannot resist. I love him.
The reality that he will have to face is that he has to take the good and the bad. My boyfriend is not one who likes to talk, he doesn’t like to discuss things, and he’s always saying he doesn’t want to get into that. I have news for him; there is no way he can just walk away without a word, which is what he has tried to do. There are times when I feel compelled to just walk away and allow the spirits to bring me someone else, one who understands and can deal with who I am. Then I state out loud he is the one I have chosen and there is a reason he was allowed to enter my life so let the river flow. I can and I am able to condition him, but I choose not to. That is not the reason for which I received my gift. He tried to walk away most recently, because he felt overwhelmed with the things that were being revealed while he was trying to keep secrets. I had to explain to him that nothing will remain hidden, and that I and special and so different from anyone he has ever been with.
At first I believed that he was chosen because he is so nonchalant and seemed to be unfazed by my spiritual doings. The first time he came to my house and saw the candles burning at the door set there to appease Eshu, and didn’t ask a question, I was like wow. Then again, when we went to the spiritual store (not a botanica), and I purchased some of many statues and he carried them to the car, reverently I might add. The only thing he objected to is the burning of incense in HIS house, everything else was fine. I talked to him about my spirituality and made light of it. The first day I moved into my new house, he came and smelt the incense and me tell him say me naw sleep in deh without burn it out. The Rose of Jericho sits on my table in its bowl of water. The glass of blue water with Yemaya’s stones and shells and such stand guard by my door. To top it all off, that night I pulled out my cards and told him I could read him. When he picked up a bottle of barbacourt rum and said what is this liquor, I told him that’s the spirit stuff, he remarked I could have poisoned him what if he had drunk it.
Then after I pulled out some more things, as I was arranging the house, so he said what’s that more obeah stuff, him say Lord Jesus Christ, Mr. X son come a foreign come find mother woman. I laughed but I think that in a way when he went into himself he begun to realize that all this is real. Then he tried to separate. I actually dreamt him riding away on his bike, the morning after I dreamt that he stopped answering my calls. Things have not been the same and I don’t expect them to be. He thinks that I am crazy, and I don’t blame him, because when tall Bongo come to take over him just lose. My spiritual forces are, will be, and have always been with me. I can’t help that, it is something to be understood and respected. This forces him to be at war with himself about his perceived relationship with me. He also loves me because I am like cool water, and can be counted on to let things flow. You the reader have to understand that previously my spirituality has always been private to me, and this is the first person that I’ve opened up certain things to. Has anyone had similar issues, male or female? Let me know and let’s have a serious discussion about my problem, for I fear that my emotions are getting the best of me…Ase O….
The owl is the wisest of all birds because the more it sees, the less it talks……Yoruba Proverb