July 14, 2014 Obara Meji 122Comment

As usual, I ponder on what to write daily. It is not as if I am running out of topics, it is that there are too many topics to choose from. Which one to write about depends upon my mood and where my spirit will guide me, as spirit is the motivator of all things. Yesterday as we all blogged together a blogger mentioned his family, his children and that they are who he lives for, his love for his children was touching especially for me. This is what he wrote “Whatever dreams that I once had, I want my children to fulfill them. I now live for them–my family by and large–and all available energies are harnessed and targeted toward them”. This touched me, and warmed my heart, good men are out there, good family men who are responsible and loves their wives and children and for some reason whenever I see this I am wowed.

I pondered on that statement all night, and I had even more respect and love for this blogger, and I silently prayed for him and his family and also others that they be bonded together always with the spirit of family, love and unity. In recent years I had no thought to family, other than my children, I have no family. I was the one who grew all my children all on my own. There were no father around to help make decisions on school, or teach my boys about sex and the risks or take them to a baseball game, or just to hang out. I did not have anytime to regret either of these men who fathered my children because I had to think about other things, like how to survive and take care of them. So missing the fathers was the last thing on my mind. I didn’t. Non of the fathers are apart of the children’s lives, not one and they are both alive. I had never taken any to child support court or asked them for anything and none of them has ever offered. No phone calls for Christmas, birthdays or otherwise, it’s just me and them, my children. Some months ago I felt like gathering them  around and asking them how did they feel not having a father in their lives and all of them said, “NOT MISSED MOM”!! That made me feel good for them and for me, it told me that I did a good job, but I know way down deep that the “Daddy influence’ would have been just as good, if I had chosen that road for me before coming here to this earth plane to live.

When I went to Africa I asked the Babalaows why? Why was it that in my life I had to do everything all by myself and I was the one to take care of everyone, including my sisters and parents. It is as if it is expected of me to do so and when It came time for me to do it, financially speaking, I gave no thought to it, I  just did. They told me “And it will never change!, it will never change! Obara Meji it will never change!”, They went on to reason with me telling me of my Odu Ifa (the Odu which I got when I received Ifa), and how it tells them that God wants me on top. Osun wants me to be able at all times and in all things to be independent

This morning I woke up still thinking on the blogger and what he said about his family and also other people, men who I know who love and care for their families, I decided to sit down again with a Babalawo and discuss my life. In one of my posts, I do not remember which one I wrote about staying with the childrens father amid abuse because I believed that the abuse would eventually end and better would come one day, it never did. So I sat with the Babalawo this morning and asked the question. I told him what the other Bablawo’s had said to me and asked him to explain to me why it was that my life had turned out that way and he told me a story of Osun, the Orisha to whom I am an initiate.

The Babalawo told me that Osun is a very strong woman, and that Orunmila, although he had many wives, Osun was his favorite. He loved her the most because of her strength. Osun and Orunmila, though husband and wife, never lived together, she lived near the river with her children, while he lived in Oke Itashe in the town of Ile Ife (ill-lay  E-fay).  Osun had many children and she never left them, she took care of them very well which earned her nuff respect from everyone, which made Orunmila love her even more. Osun became her husband’s confidant, he would sit and talk to her about serious matters and he also took her advice, remember Orunmila himself embodies wisdom. She was no ordinary woman, infact she became known as the manly woman, although extremely beautiful and very feminine. Manly, because she did everything for herself, independent to the core and all and everyone depended on her. This was a power she had which has made her even to this very day, the most loved Orisha! When I became initiated to Osun, My Godmother said to me “Congratulations Obara Meji, you are now an Initiate of the most powerful Orisha”!

In Nigeria Babalawo’s seek to marry an Osun woman, if they can. It is said that when Osun is with the Babalawo, he can never go without. Osun is the wife who will go out and bring in the work for her husband, be with the husband who is out in the field planting seeds with her baby tied to her back working right along with him, the name Osun literally means Source. She is water, sweet water of which we drink when we thirst, who can live without water, “Water got no enemy”, this is a famous saying among the Yoruba’s and musician Fela Kuti made it a song.

What the Babalawo said to me made sense, because he told me of my life when he spoke of never leaving my children, and as I was an Initiate of Orisha Osun, I realized that I was indeed her archetype. This was who I was/am. This was my life and I had to accept it. Though I wanted the LIFE, so to speak of the husband and children, what my mother and father had together, forever, for me it was not to be. The Babalawo continued to say that I should consider the two father’s of my children and why we could not work out as a family or as husband and wife, he said it is because both our energies(vibrations, I am using his words) did not agree. He pointed out to me that whenever I heard their names or voices how my spirit got cross, (which is true), he said that was an indication that our spirits did not agree and that a long standing relationship between us would not have worked much less be pleasant.

I told him I understood that and I was not sorry about neither of these two being apart of my life but what about the childrens life, not even an attempt has been made by them to be around the children, and he shook his head and said “No Obara Meji, If you were an Ordinary woman I would understand, but you are not an Ordinary woman and neither are your children ordinary children”. He asked me if any of my children ever lamented over their father, and I did not have to think about it because the answer was no, and he answered by saying “eh hehhh!”, while nodding in agreement with me, “You see?, they had no time to miss de daddy, he said in Pidgin English (their form of patois) because you, de mommy did de two job very well. You are Osun and it is to be expected.

I weighed my mind as he spoke, and thought about Osun. A part of me wanted to say, this sucks! Another part wanted to shout Oore Yeye OOO Osun OOOO! (All praises to my mother Osun!). Then the thought came In my mind that It cannot be All Osun women  who took care of their babies on their own, some had the support of husband and children, and formed the family that I wanted and missed out on, I said this to him and he said, “Obara Meji, you cannot put your destiny with another person, everybody has his own destiny, this one is yours. What you admire in another person’s life, which is not what you have in yours, is not for you, if it were for you, you would have had it, instead something took its place, a swap out if you want to call it that, what would you trade now for that life which others have and you do not?” he asked, and I pondered seriously for a long time while he waited for my response. I looked at everything in my life and all which I had gone through and all which I now have and where I am currently and thought, As for material things I have nothing, I am not wealthy in terms of money wagga wagga (plenty money), I do not own properties or lands, other than with family which I have walked away from (the fight too much). I looked on into space as I pondered on, while he waited patiently for my reply, I have health and all my children are doing well, I have the love of God, the spirits, Orishas and human beings (some), I have lived an extraordinary life and it continues, I want for nothing, and I have met some incredible people and have been apart of some exclusive things, I am an Initiate, a Spiritualist, a Traditionalist, a Medium, a Diviner ,a Herbalist, a Blogger, Chief Cook and Backle washer, Hell of a Hair Dresser, Student, Teacher, Candlestick Maker (lol), Mother, Father, Sister, Brother, even Village Lawyer, Counselor, Adviser, Chief Decision Maker, Royal and Never Dis-Loyal, to anyone, and more.  I looked up at him and answered “No, I would not trade a thing, God has been good to me”. To this he smiled and spread both hands as if to say “you see, what more do you want?” I felt complete, happy and whole, and I silently thanked God, and Osun and Orunmila and all my ancestors. I then fi ori bale, (touched my head to the ground) before the Babalawo, Orunmila’s representative for his wisdom, then I went to Osun’s shrine and thanked her, OOre Yeye O Osun OOOOO, Omi oooooo!!!!  how blessed am I to have her!

For all the women out there who have met the perfect mate or a good man, fathers of your children who are with you and are present in your children’s lives, I am happy for you, be happy for yourselves. You have been blessed,  truly blessed! I urge you to treat these men in your lives very well and honor what you have. For single parents such as myself, who had four to take care of, and all mine were born one behind each other, not many years apart, and there I was with them all on my own, many nights I worried as they all slept what would tomorrow bring, but tomorrow always brought food and we always had shelter and we were ok without a father’s help or presence. Women, respect your men, love them and honor them, the ones who are there and are supportive, who work and take care of his family, love him, he is hard to find and he is a treasure, as Dennis Brown song says, “Hold on to what you got“! In Africa when a woman serves her husband his meal, she brings the food on a tray and goes on her knees and serve him, while on her knees, Ite Riba fun oko, which means Loyal to husband. At first when I saw that, the Jamaican in me said “mi nah do dat !”, I will not do that, (and I still will not, but I understand and respect them), but as I live amongst them and saw how important family was to the Africans, and how the husband loved and took care of his wife and children, he respects her. I saw how devoted the fathers were to their children, I realized that the wives as taught by their mothers to honor their husbands, had the right to honor her King this way.

He was the man, and he played his role. It does not take away your strength as a woman to honor your men, it shows that you are indeed very strong, because you both play a role in each others lives and so as you honor him, he also honors you. He stays with you and hold down his household as a man! It is so easy for men to run away from their responsibilities, especially here in our part of the world. We see it every day. In Africa I have learned from these women, what I learned from my mother, but it had left when I met some no good men. My mother honored my father, in the evenings she would share his food, the meat shared separate from the provisions (yam, banana and dumplins), vegetables and rice in separate containers. If he was late to come home she kept his food warm over a pot of water on the stove and when he came home, she served him. My mother was a very strong woman but she loved her husband and showed him so by her actions. I saw my mother’s action here in Africa in how these women treat their Kings and same in how the men treated their Queens. When I speak to them and they speak of their wives they say “look what she do for me”, meaning taking care of the children. I was puzzled at first when I heard them say that because I thought, “What she did for you?, they are her children too”. I thought it was her duty to look after her children as I had to look after mine, but then I realized that they did not see it that way, they saw it as a responsibility shared and appreciated their Queen for all she did. Lovely!

I know some of you will say “Obara, on my knees to serve a man I will not do”, and I am in no way saying that is what we should do, I just wanted to show how in other cultures things are done differently and looked upon as such. It is easy to praise the mothers, and we do so all the time in our part of the world because so many of our men skip out on their responsibilities. However this post is to tip our caps to the good ones out there and give our respect, they deserve it. We know it is their duty but unfortunately many of them skip, run, skedaddle or in the case of my first child, if I do not want him he has nothing to do with us.

Women, do not spend time cursing the dead beat dad’s, they cannot do any better, it is to be how it is, it is fate, apart of your destiny. If he has wronged you or the child, leave him to God. Do not succumb to high blood pressure or depression wondering why you or why the kid (s), it is what it is. If you fight him for money or support through the courts, then that is on you, but if he walks ways from his responsibility having nothing to do with the children, leave him, do not mind him, he was selected by the child for a reason and only God and your Ori knows why, move forward and do the best you can, find your strength.

I have accepted my fate, and at times (de being human ting) I sigh and wish, but then I straighten up and realize that my destiny is my destiny, but I am a romantic at heart and I love to see families together, I am in love with love! Ah me sey Harem, (lol).  Horray for all ah de good man dem, big up oonuh chest!. I applaud you. Not every woman will be able to have this family bond and setting in their lives, for those, who like me had to do it alone, know that you chose that life before you came here, and maybe you had to swap something important out for it, nothing happens by chance. If you could not do it alone, your Ori would not have allowed you to chose your life like that, also know that you have a depth of strength and you are not alone, God will always pick up the slack of the dead beat dads. For all the women fortunate to have men like my blogger for a father for their children or step fathers, honor and love them, do not take them for granted, they are a dime a dozen, a dime a dozen! nuff respect!

 

Yíyọ́ ẹkùn, kì í ṣe t’ojo. /
The stealthy movement of the leopard is not out of cowardice.

[Do not mistake gentleness for stupidity or cowardice]

All religions are valid as long as it teaches peace and love…Obara Meji!

 

 

When one has not had a good father, one must create one.

Friedrich Nietzsche

I hope I am remembered by my children as a good father.

Orson Scott Card

 

 

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122 Comments on "A GOOD DAD SHOULD BE HONORED AND RESPECTED"

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Tw/Yw
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Tw/Yw

Wow, thank you for sharing, Obara Meji. The hard work and dedication to your kids cannot be over highlighted. You have a stronger family unit between you and your kids than you likely would with some destructive male in the picture. Being a father and husband is more than gender related. It involves certain characteristics that many men (again needed traits overshadowed by physical observation) lack. You were and remain a father to your kids in the more overlooked but so much more important ways of the word. How amazing you are to fulfill the two roles in one being.

MTH
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Tonks Teacher!!!

Obara meji
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I agree Yw

Obara meji
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I look forward YW

Obara meji
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Lol you deserve it

Toy
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Ekaso Everyone! Love and light

Obara Meji
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Obara Meji

I never see Mth poem , it lovely

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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How though provoking is–relative the man Tafari Makonnen?

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7RmcQEzYho&w=560&h=315]

MTH
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What a irony of irony… Today is my big daughter dad’s birthday…

MTH
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TEach mi a guh behave miself…Mi caan guh Africa wid dem behaviour here!!!

MTH
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*sulking* off to the naughty corner I go…

Naughty corner is fun
I would stay here in the rain or sun
It might hard but nuh badda gi nuh bun

Wi know di road code
Suh wi nuh easily get bored

More pan more
A dat a fi wi score

MTH
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AMH how are you?

AMH
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Effervescent, not sure if you can really use that word to describe your mood but I am throwing it out there anyway haha.

MTH
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DJ Lyrics
Teacha sey mi can, mi can
Mi neva get nuh wrang bang fi dweet inna di van

Di man dem like how mi teet have gap
Dem all waan gi mi tings fi mi siddung inna dem lap

Loving is the best
No war, no stress
This lesson I give is free
Tried, proven and tested by me….

MTH
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Who like dah poem here?

I am gentle as a dove
I am praying to the man above
For health, happiness and love

I love Obara my Teacher
She can be considered as our Mother and Preacher

We love to say love and light
We give the creator thanks with all our might
Sometimes we are said and have many a plight
That can not let us off the good, loose sight

I come here everyday to post
I thank God for you all the most
I love even the peepers
They come here because they are seekers….

Tw/Yw
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Tw/Yw

Very nice, MTH.

Ty
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I love di poem…

AMH
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spectacular!

MTH
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Teach wey yu dey? Come chap 2 lyrics…

MTH
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Nile mi a put mi ears out dey fi yu gwan whisper to mi…You can all count fi mi and mi wi settle down and behave…

MTH
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Unno leggo unno stiff uppa lip. Dah site yah a fun wi embrace. Sometimes cawfee sometimes tea.

MTH
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Kiss mi rasss all Bubblez bruck out to….No unno is a set…A weyYazzy dey? How slackness a gwan an shi nuh forward yet.

Teach rinse di chune….

MTH
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Woieee mi ting…Mr. Niles, mi juss si yu comment…What a way yu mouth sweet!!!

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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MTH, every once is a while, I am regarded as one who has his way with words!!!

kiabubblez
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kiabubblez

Obara looooool of course mi seet n LOL MTH nuh pay sum gal nuh mind eno sum small frame man av more dan dem share oooooooooo

ah doe kno ah doe know oooo man is a beautiful artwork mi luv look pon hmmmmmmmm mi luv man from dem head top to dem foot battam

pull up mth money pull up grung bout fine voice dem lyrics soun heavy mi affi love man ooooooo

MTH
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Suh unno leff mi one wid di slackniss..

Anyways unno sey Gregory suh mi sey Gregory to..

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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Si di big sang ya:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NanRTn0d2ss&w=420&h=315]

MTH
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Teach ketch diss..

Teach mi haffi love man
A dem alone can cool mi dung more dan a fan
Mi mi dweet inna di car back or even di van
dis yah baddy yah, nuh gal caan swear pan

How mi soun, how mi soun?

MTH
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Teach, mi naah watch dem an dem short argument. Him can si it inna him eyes sey him dangerous…From him can stand up pan him own den a nuh nutten..

Mr. Nile sey him a di youngest one pan di site, mi naah fight dat.. Suh dat mean sey him a baby fi mi den? It fair fi mi sey pap out mi 38C and feed him…Oh goodness a joke mi a mek (I just had to get that one out..A suh mi like slackniss more time). Memba Nile sey nutten nuh out sey fi mek him stray…

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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MTH, note seh we dell inna realm weh everything is relative!!! Some might be young but dem tallawah and ting!!! We seh we older than time itself as the aim is to transcend time.

Ancient of Days Movement!!!

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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Gregory in the Morning:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ATvOGbtKto&w=420&h=315]

MTH
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Bubblez mi mount a time mi guh dance, mi nuh muss can juggle 2 chune…Mi can dj but mi vice kina fine suh mi nuh know bout dat…

MTH
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Gwan mi Teacha!!! Konshens nice. However him did post pictures inna him boxers and the ladies did a sey him come up short…Personally him neva look bad to me…Dat a me still. Memba mi tell yu sey mi like small frame man.

kiabubblez
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kiabubblez

Ekaro good morning my lovely ES family looooool unno vibezy suh Obara a DJ n MTH a run di sound!!!

Bredda Nile respect due!!! I often look for ur comments as they are full of knowledge and wisdom. Even tho u think yu a di youngest here lol you are far wiser than some elders. Bless up YW, Oguntunde, Shawnyrob an all great husbands and fathers.

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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HAHA, Kia, thank you very much. Embracing Spirituality is all about light reflecting light and I am loving it…

MTH
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How di man dem tun fathers? Cause dem love punnay bad..

MTH
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OBARA MEJI yu caan leggo dem lyrics suh yu mek mi leggo one big dutty laugh and mek the ppl dem a get fi si sey mi is a unda cova skettel…

MTH
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Teach yu can ride dis….

MTH
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Lalibella dis one a yourns…

MTH
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Mr. Nile, nuh watch nuh face. They absentee dads someday will find out what they have missed by not being there.

Teach, yu have Sugar Daddy wey send dem girls guh school, set up businesses, love dem, tender touch dem…A lie?

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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MTH, love and light; thank you for your extremely generous words! I am a work in progress and on this mission of love failure is not acceptable. I know that there are a lot of absentee fathers; however, I don’t buy into the notion that black men don’t take care if their children.

As a people, we’ve seemingly lost our way–entertain the notion that in a by gone era we also systematically denied the ‘way’. Of course, some of don’t honor the expectations of a father and when you check the levels, there are a plethora of reasons why a father might be absent. Let it be know, there is justifiable excuse for not being their with one’s family.

It all boils down to not understanding what it take and mean to be a family.

I am afraid that my brothers are all married and as far as friends and cousins, I subscribe to random arrangements!!!

MTH
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I know that there are good Sugar Daddies out there. Respect…

MTH
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Mr. Nile. YW, Cgoh, Shawnyrob all the good fathers this is just for you.

MTH
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My people please give this a listening ear

MTH
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To all the good step-fathers…

MTH
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Morning my fambo. Mr. Nile I loved/admired you from the get go. Now I’m so inspired/awed and all the other superlatives that suggest the best.

I admire your pic of you and your daughter and I said there goes a good man. I know all is not lost. Any man that puts a supreme being as the head of his family is a wise man.

I love a man that honours his woman and children.

*yu nuh have any brother/uncle/friend/nephew/cousin etc wey stay like you?*

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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When my children become disruptive or miserable, I count for them and they calm down. My 11-month old did not want to get his diaper changed and all I had to do was start counting and he was all giggles.

Whether by gesture or vocalizing, my children seem to love the sound of numbers. Can you tell that I am a proud father?

Obara meji
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I know lalibela I saw it! I pray everyday to meet good people Osun has found favor with me!

Obara meji
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Yuh nuh live mi lyrics, Ty mi bx an mi deh ahe ah tump dung lyrics

Ty
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Di lyrics dem baa ad…how you one so talented?

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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Obara, blessed love and much appreciated; I am beyond flattered.

Obara meji
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As so you should be! Children are a gift to be proud if and cherished!

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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Light and greetings to one and all!! Thank you all for your warm regards. If a man were to truly understand God’s love and His design for us, such a man would find pleasure in being a great husband and a father.

I was there from day one. We initially had a miss-carriage and with the discovery of our next pregnancy, that was it for work–my negeste [queen] and lij [child] came first.

I have been to every doctor visit and I was definitely there at the time of birth–I was doing all the coaching along with running the Skype session so that our extended family in Africa could observe that which transpired.

When I am home, I do most of the baths, diaper changing, feeding, et al and I would have it no other way. My daughter know how to count at around the age of one and in two languages–well I guess she is ambidextrous and bi-lingual. She knows her ABC, the days of the week and such–not to mention knowing her different animals. The sky is the limit for her…

Then the little man is moving at a faster pace than she did…

All thanks and praises to the Most High…

Obara Meji
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Obara Meji

ASE, Lalibella, you inspired this post, love and light, to you and yours

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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So when I was young and naive, I was taught that the world was going to to end in the year 2000. I feared not having time to get married and have children. We all know what transpired at the end of 1999.

For the longest, I have deemed and desired to have a daughter. So much so that I had a name and even an email address for her :). God blessed me with a wonderful daughter two years ago and for such, I am perpetually grateful to the Most High. Approximately a year later, I was blessed with a wonderful son; again, I was eternally grateful.

My children are my everything; they’ve brought meaning to my life in way that I could not have imagined prior. My woman is my queen and my everything and for as long as I live, I will ensure that she is mindful such. There is repaying for all that she has done and represent in my life. It is for this reason why when I read the following, it made all the sense in the world to me:

“One day you will ask me which is more important? My life or yours? I will say mine and you will walk away not knowing that you are my life.”― Khalil Gibran

When I am with my family, I am alway take pictures of them and absorbing everything that is them. I travel a lot so when I am on the plane, I get to browse through my photos of them. For whatever it is worth, our children are more attached to me. Though their mommy is the epitome of live, my daughter cry when I leave and says goodbye to her mommy when she leave out the door. Whenever I come home, my daughter throws herself to the ground, soliciting me for my attention—now I see that my son is doing the same. When I am home, they are all over me—as they currently are.

I explain that my children can sense that I am all about love and as such, they are drawn to me. Whenever, we tell my daughter that we love her, she tells us that she know. My daughter refuses to eat, she find more pleasure in feeding me. I have a very jealous woman in my house as is not easy for a woman to see her children crying for their father instead of her. Trust me, my children love their mother. However, since I connect with them on a different level, any mother would feel a certain way. I am all about love and embracing my responsibilities.

Obara, apparently, Paul the Apostle, is regarded by many to be a liar. However, even if only for allegory he had a task to do and he realized that there was not room in his life for a wife. Hence, he elected to never get married.

Obara, chances are that your life is as such where a husband would function as an albatross in your life and deny many the ability to receive that which you bring forth…

In an effort to not be derelict in your duties, Individuals like yourself often times have to make sacrifices for the greater good of humanity.

Obara, it is very easy for a man to run away from his family and believe me, women have a way of causing men to think about giving up. However, as for myself, I have to be a dedicated and present father for many reasons. YWHW being the head of my household and He is the center of my universe. Accordingly, there is not situation or temptation that is potent enough to compel me to abandon my family.

My father was too good of a father for me not to even attempt to be a decent father to my children.

Obara meji
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I love that men like you exist, there aren’t many, we honor you Lalibela, your parents did a great job! I emailed you did you get it?

Lalibela A Nile (@Lalibela_Nile)
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Obara, et al, I can’t thank you all enough. I just saw, read and responded to your email 🙂

Ty
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Big up all the father figures, grandfathers….

kiabubblez
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kiabubblez

Nite Nunu i too have pop pops i honor, love n miss dear. Love dem both n remember the times we had together even tho ot was a short time.

NuNu
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NuNu

Kia I am happy that we at least met them and spent some time with ours ! Some of my cousins missed out

kiabubblez
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kiabubblez

Yes Nunu the younger gineration missed out. We are special to have meet them m learned from them. Big up grandaddy Owen n Jesse!!!

NuNu
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NuNu

Thanks Teach! Mi hope the father of my children (if mi have any) love them like how gramps loved his. Mi woulda feel suh good!

kiabubblez
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kiabubblez

Ekale ES Kabeysi Sango hail Oya u a step chru n di breeze feel nice along wid di powerful thunder!
To all fathers, daddies, step dads, pop pops thank u. U are wonderful n appreciated never to be taken for granted.

NuNu
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NuNu

Yailings Kia!

NuNu
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NuNu

Big up everybody!!! I didn’t have a good father growing up but my mumzy took on that role without hesitation. Just like Teach she single handedly raised C and myself without any help, love u mumzy! The man I admire that stood by his family and took care of them was my maternal grandfather. Mumzys’ daddy was the best! He use to also take care of the other kids in the district too, those who couldn’t afford to send their kids to school he’d work extra hours to help pay for school fees and uniforms/ books if needed, love you grandpa I’ll see u again one day!

Obara meji
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Yw is another one I respect big up tuh self mi fren! my friend Shawnyrob is also awesome

Tw/Yw
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Tw/Yw

One day Obara, wi ah go lik head and the world (or at least a small part of it) will not be the same.

NuNu
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NuNu

Big up Yw and Shawnyrob, Mr.Nile, good dads really deserve the big up!

Ty
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Big up to all the fathers who have made the decision to play apart in their family’s life…I honor and respect you all…

Big up to all the mothers who had to step up and do the father’s role…I honor and respect you…

We have a talented and loving bunch here…Nile your love for baby Nile is felt here everyday and is is heart warming… I am not sure who else has kids…

To my hubby and compadre YW, you done know how the ting set…I am so happy that I chose you to be the father of my boys…you are wonderful, caring, loving, and kind hearted… I cherish you and know that I could not do this all by myself…thank you thank you thank you…

Obara, as a mother, I am in awe of how you were able your raise your kids so well on your own…you are the embodiment of Osun, the manly woman… Your kids chose well by picking you as a mother…

Ore Yeye Osun…

Tw/Yw
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Tw/Yw

Yu ah go mek mi bawl…. All back to you =)

NuNu
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NuNu

Howdy Ty and big up Bredda YW!

MTH
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Ok. Thank you.

MTH
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Teach, Yemoja ladies usually have big boobs and Osun ladies oozes sex appeal. What abouy Oya’s ladies? What is their dominan physical trait?

MTH
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I have two big pineapples at home and some nice perfume. I will fix up something for Miss Hotty-Hotty Osun. I am going to appeal to her for my hussy. I am finally ready to settle down.

MTH
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Ok. Teach, arent you Osun’s child? How does one honour Osun…What does she like?

MTH
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Teach, is there an Orisha that focuses primarily on the family/gives one a partner?

Toy
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So sweet! Yes,big up all of the good men out there.

MTH
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Teach, the 2 last quotes sell off.

Oh shit, I just wrote that I am praying for my friend that death may tarry in coming for him. Listening to Kool 97 fm and the same ‘2 less lonely people in the world is playing.’ OMG!!! Seems to me, that I will definately loose him…

MTH
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Thank you Teach!!!! I know there are some really good men out there who do not get the respect that they deserve… I pray that they willnot deter in doing good. Some many people are the beneficaries of having a good step dad.

MTH
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This is the reason I love Peanut so mich. He was a family man and even in death, his family meant everything to him…

MTH
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Teach, I cant believe how much this post has touched me…I am just realising how special my gay friend is to me.

The reason we became such close friends is how he treated my daughter last christmas. My friend is the dad I wished I had or my children had. I didnt have that in a dad, but I have it in my close friend. SRF, I salute you and I love you.

This blog just reminded me of another blessing I have but did not realise how much of a blessing it was. Thanks for these super post Teach…

MTH
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Thanks AMH. My gay friend has been such a good friend to me, I can not find ways to honour him. Last week Sunday mornig I had a bad dream and Teach said that it was for this friend. I could have fasted before today, but I fasted for him and pray that death will not take him just yet.

We work at the same company but recently I was transfered to another location. He is closer to the baby’s day-care. He goes for he every evening so when I get off the first staff bus I can quickly grab her and catch the second one. He doesnt have to, but he orders he lunch every day and takes it to her…

Her report was good and he wants to know what we (he and I) will be doing for he. He opens doors for me. He calls me to make sure I reach home safely. When we go to the gym he carries my towels, he helps me with the machines, he gets my water.

AMH
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It warms my heart to know you have someone so caring so close by you. I will pray for your friend as well.

MTH
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AMH, I join you in saluting your honey who is a good example/dad to your children…

Last Thursday, my girlfriend took the baby on the staff bus for me as I had to go collect her report. My gay friend saw the baby with my friend on the bus, he called me and said that he saw that she didnt have her lunch kit and he took her and bought her breakfast and snack, then took her to the nursey.

He called me and said, ‘M I am taking my daugher to get breakfast and she doesnt have her lunch kit so I will her something’. He got her tablet as he said that she looks bored on the bus. My gay friend has stepped up to be a great dad to my daughter.

AMH
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What a wonderful friend. I have learned that the friends we keep are a good reflection of our character, wonderful people make wonderful friends. Your darling baby is blessed all around.

AMH
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Thank you for writing this. I definitely get trapped in the frustration over my children’s fathers lack of anything resembling parental instinct, I try to let it go, I will try harder.

However my sweetheart (though he second guesses himself) is an amazing example for them, offering wisdom and love and being ever present for them. I am proud to be able to honor him in the small ways I can. He not only tries to teach our littles things to help them grow but he tries to show them the kind of man they should want (when the time comes which I hope will not be anytime in the next 15 years or so lol) I am so grateful for him every single day and I try to make him know it too.

On a side note: what significance do reoccurring dreams have? There are a few dreams that I have quite often, a couple I’ve had since childhood.

MTH
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Thanks for this post Obara. It has hit very deeply. I thank God for my two children. I have done it without their fathers. The baby her father is 30% present in her life.

Several times since last week Thursday when I collected her school report, I have had to cry. Inspite of everything she does well. In my household we have an abudance of joy. We are a happy bunch. We have good health and each other. bless the Most High…

MTH
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Teach, you were the chief cook and bottle washer at the same time? Heheheh. Mek a gwan read…

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