Hi folks here is a story of child abuse and molestation sent in from one of our readers. You will recall the two post that I posted about family disconnection. There are spiritual explanations why everything happens in life, however hard it is to deal with, the answer is always, WHY?. Here is the Story of Anna, and I am so happy that she wanted me to share because someone can read this and be more careful and focus on their child OR children. We gain wisdom through experience, but it does not have to be YOUR experience, it can be someone else’s.
Hi Obara Meji
my name is Anna Marie Bell but i more like people calling me ANNA, rather than Anna I was born in St. Catherine Jamaica, my mom had her first child by my father when she was 13 go on 14 but he died and then she had me when she was 15, my father loved is little boy so he didn’t really look at me. When my bother died something inside him died too. Mom told me when I was little everyone loved me and wanted to keep me.
She even told me this white Lady wanted to adopt me and I ask her why she didn’t gave me away and she said my father said she killed one child and now she want to give way the other so she didn’t, I never had a birthday party my mom said I did when I was one but who gonna remember that? and they didn’t even take no picture of me none , she gonna tell me that wasn’t out back then when she had a big ass baby pic of her on her wall over her bed.
In Jamaica my mom had a big house that my great-grandmother left her when she died my mom had her own room and so did I and she rented out the other rooms to people my mom was a teenager had a house for her self ,my mom is a very when i say very I clean very clean person you could see year face in her floor that’s how clean she is.
I was a person that loved to walk , I could walk for hour, and I loved school even tho I didn’t know how to read I knew how to do my work. I was a very happy person and till my cousin Nicki came to live with us she use beat me everyday day for no reason she could just see me sitting in my room and hit me in the head with something for no reason I felt like it’s because her man beats her she takes it out on me whenever she see me around I told my mom but she really didn’t really say nothing….
I remember one night when I was sleeping I felt something moving under my sheet touching me up and down my private part there he was my cousin Riccardo molested me in my sleep I didn’t know what to do should I tell my mom or not I didn’t even know how this grown man got in my room in the first place and my door was locked. I got up outta bed and I wenT in my mom room but she was sleeping and her boyfriend was in there with her so I just went back in my room. When I went in he was gone, i was 5years old at that time . So I sat down on the bed till morning come and then I told my mom what happened and then I hear her cursing him out she told me that they wanted to kill him but she save his life cause my grandmother was there and she didn’t want her to witness it and plus they would be the one to bury him cause he didn’t have any other family…..
I remember one night me and my mom when to my great grand uncle house and my mom was talking to him for a lil bit and my mom had ask if she could borrow is radio gun so we could listing to music and he gave it too her so me and my mom went down the road to check her friend and they was they for while talking until her friend told her go home and mind something happen to you cause it was very dark out so me and my mother started walking walking and then suddenly my mom stop right by this old shop right by our house she saw two men with gun I couldn’t see them because it was so dark……
it was so dark I could see anything all I could hear was my mom saying don’t shoot my daughter don’t shoot my daughter I didn’t see the guys that she was talking to when I hear the first shot my mom told me to run and I started running and running,running and I heard another shot till i pissed on myself.
I starting crying and crying, crying crying till I see lisa and Tisha walking up the street I kept saying my mom got shot! my mom got shot! my mom got shot! it was like they didn’t even care they just kelp on walking. I couldn’t stop crying I cried the hold night. I went to my cousin house that night…….
she ask me what was wrong but I couldn’t speak because I was in so much temper I couldn’t stop crying. I stayed at my cousin for a lil bit and till my Aunt maria came to get me and took me to the hospital where my mom was I was soooo scared to touch her or go near her I felt like was gonna hurt her if I touch her. They told me that my next door neighbor help her. She said that my mom crawl over the fences to her house…….after my mother got better we went to live with her boyfriend long story short after a while living there my mom left to America and leave me with him that when things got worst she thought she could trust this man leaving me there with him. I remember one time before I move to live with him when I was sleeping and him and my mom was having sex right next to me, I remember one a them say she sleeping…..like that make it right having sex while am in the room, so after they was done and leave the room I got up and this nigga look thru the wIndow and wink at me……
Anyways after my mom left to America the man brin how many woman over there and when my mom send money for me he would always gamble it off. After while he would call me in his room and tell me take all my clothes off he had this big mirror in his bed room that he let me bend over and he would watch me for hours and till he tells me to go then after a while he would have sex with me and told not tell, every one this man was a gun man plus he make guns them times I didn’t really know what the word rape means and till i got to America every time my mom would call and ask if everything was okay and I would say yeah because I was afraid cause this was the man that she left me with, no one else so really didn’t know what to do so one day my mom and tell me to pack my things and go stay with my cousin the one I stay with when she got shot. I stay with for her and one day she see me hitching my private part and she took me to the doctor and said how she something was wrong with me, she told me some crazy story just for me to tell her what was going on with me so finally told her what happened and then the next day everybody in Jamaica knew about it, a mob of people came down on him the man was killed which I really wish I didn’t hear about it because somebody died with him that day that shouldn’t have and that still sit with me up to this day. Living with my cousin was hell but as always when my mom call I would say am okay every time my mom would send money for they would use it and whatever they wanted to do with it…
I remember one time before my mom left to America when I was sleeping and my cousin was passing on the bed she burned me with iron and told mom that I burn her first up to this day I still have triangle mark on my hand from where she burn me……………anyway after while living with my cousins I move to stoneyhill to live with my cousin Hadean and her mother and son its was the same treatment I got from when I use live with my other cousins every time my mom send money for me she would use it fi build up her house or buy things to do people nails, her mother man every night he would come to my bed talking about him want me and a whole lot of other things so I always use to tell this lady what he would say to me at night. Its like everywhere I go it follow me I felt cursed, didn’t know why this shit kept happening to me…………..they comfront the man about it and tell him to stop bother me and my cousin ask me if I wanted the same thing to happen to him that had happen to my mom boyfriend and I said nooooo. I hated drama and I hated violence just wanted him to go away and leave me alone, after a while living there I move to my cousin name daughter house a cousin I never knew about she was old anything I ask for she would give because my mother sent her money and she didn’t need my moms money cause she got her own she was living good and she alway played the lotto like crazy. I lived with her and till this lady from America came to get me and I went to live with in America with her, I thought coming here was gonna be great I had thought anything, coming from the life I have WOULD GET BETTER I know it just got worst………THATS ANOTHER STROY I HAVE TO TELL YOU NEXT TIME
Anna i am sorry to hear also about the things you have experienced…it’s nice to know that you feel comfortable enough with your embracer family that you can share these experiences with us…as Obara always say sometimes we are put on this earth to experience these very things…when you said that everywhere you go it seemed to follow you…and you felt cursed…i felt tears for you…im glad that you are able to overcome those obstacles…a true gg…you have to turn them monkey deh inna stepping stone…better life for u and any kids u may have…awooah
Mi gawn!!! cyaan manij di dagga an di rack stone dem whey ah fling dung yah….Woieee mi head, one jusss kannek
Well come awfa it….wi need u too. Soh unless ah sum’n detrimental, COME AWFA IT….3hrs gone to rawtid
Whey yuh sey gg….mi ahgoh tun aawf fimi
Hi guys gwan teach n advice and encourage obara meji deh pon har phone! Bulittttt! Mainy n GG dwl!
Gg goodaz low me!!!
Lol…shi mussi bz
nuh d one Obara she
Who gg?
is wappen to ur communication device ma’am
Cho man Obara…..tonks
Tiffany a guy who was going through his divorce once told me…..anything or anyone that makes you angry to a certain point, has control over you….that was an eye opener for me….I realized that what he was saying was the truth (yes I had to remind him of it when he would vent) and THAT was what made me stop harboring ill feelings towards my child’s father….It takes time and I see that you’re almost there….Kudos to you Tiffany
Watch mi pickney dem a teach class GG and maniac mi proud ah oonu!
Mi sey Anna mi nuh like hear dem sinting yah enuh caws me is very protective of children, and this happens a lot in the world and often in jamaica,
Maniac never..cawz when u be bitter gainst dem and have dem up dat only set u back in life.. in alot of ways..
1. U unable to trust ppl
2. U unable fi have spiritual growth
3. is like everything u do u looking over yuh shoulder and i could go on forever
and nuhbody nah stop mi inna life wuss some lil dutty low life rapist.. cawz dem a rapers..
There u go GG……don’t let them win Tiffany
Tiffany one thing i learnt from being molested is that never in this life time i will let it get to me.. dat mite be hard to do for but is like the u mek dem d molesters win.. none and mi mean none aouuta d men dat molested mi will ever feel like dem have a hold over mi..
get counselling my dear.. it helps.. talk bout everything.. i did that and even at my old age i did seek counselling..
my last counselling session was february 17, 2011 and i am 28
🙂 I love that….Shows that you are a strong person. Keep up that strength….good things are in store for you
its hard for me to forgive but i can move on from it.now that am 20year old and i have been thru alot and i know that i have move to face down the line.i don’t let anything bother me
Tiffany mi ahgoh beg u do something for me…..Please DO NOT become a bitter person. I have a family member who went through something similar and she is bitter…..I try to help by talking to her because I KNOW that deep inside, there is a lovely person with lots of LOVE to give and I am sure it is the same for you…..Please do this for me
Tiffany….I’m reading the comments and your reply….Honey, please dont be too hard on yourself, you are here for a reason and even though you faced all this growing up, maybe its what was meant to be….I know its hard to look at it from that angle and coming from someone who doesn’t know what molestation is, you may think ‘what is she talking about, she doesn’t know jack’….I may not know first hand, but I feel your pain. Think about this Tiffany….maybe those white ppl who wanted to adopt you would have sold you as a sex slave or even… Read more »
maybe it cud have been worst but i just said that cuz of everything i was going thru and i don’t blame my mother for anything she just didn’t know how to be a mom she was young when she had me
Mek him stay deh GG, him going try dat shit wid smaddy else and dis time him woan get fi run…but like Obara sey, no evil deed goes unpunished, its out there in the universe…..feem day ah come Awoe!!!
Anna, stay strong mi luv…..Like Obara say, we all have wi cross fi bear. I know its hard, but just try to keep your head above the water and should you become a mother one day (if you aren’t already), try not to repeat your mother’s mistakes….Love and Jah guide
yes Maniac and when mi mother tell mi uncle him did pay man fi kill him and mi auntie guh back guh tell him.. from dat man leff jamaica him nuh return.. up to tideh day..
mi sey ma!!!! yuh noe whey yuh ah tawk bout…..mi did affi fite fi chuss mi fawda wid mi pikni……deep down, mi nuh tink him wudda do dat…but mi naw tek nuh check…..Wen di mista use to come roun an dem ah ramp, chue mi cyaan tek di nize, more time mi tek whey misself fi a likkle bit….but every 8 mins mi gone check…. yuh lucky….Not if mi can help it ah kakaclaat
mi have one story fi tell oonu bout one smaddy mi haffi go chang it up lickle but mi nuh have no computer till next week but oonu memba me, fi she story a go mek dah one fava cindarella in comparison!..memba me o!!!
mi use to peep pon de wicked baby fadda when him use to bathe de boys dem, tip toe and peep, mi neva a tek nuh chk
Same soh Obara…..same soh
Ef smaddy eba put dem han or hood pon fimi Ogun…..mi noe whey mi ahgoh en up…..dem sey mi paranoid, caw mi nuh really leff him nuhwhey….an as him reach back to mi, mi question an search him….mi nuh cyah!!!!! All wen him an him cuzin dem dung ah basement ah play, mi gone peep ever so often…..yep, ah me dat.
Parents and non-parents pon di site yah, mek mi tell oonu dis. Except fa di few exceptions (an wi shall call dem deh ‘caylisniss’) nuhbaddy nah goh look afta yuh pikni di way you would.
my mother worked and we had a good childhood, but she was sango child a real warrior and nobody ever try that shit wid we, look pon me, me have my children dem young from inna high schoo mi nuh shame caws mi is a young gal mumma, ppl tink me and me gal ah sista, sweet me, bex she!, but ah so…mi did like a habor shark wid mi pickney dem and than god no body never do dem nutten, or else mi wooda a lie dung yah now pon a bunk and ah feel good fi know sey… Read more »
Hi Anna this is I am so sorry at the things you went through in life, had your mother been a little more careful though probably just a little more or a lot more protective with you probably you would have been spared some of these terrible things that you went through.Having sex with you on the bed!, leaving you with her boyfriend, when she should have realized that even if she consented to screwing with you on the bed he should have said something like hell no!!!, so they are birds of the same feather, but remember this every… Read more »
i feel like if she did gave me way i proable wud have been better off
Yuh Auntie man GG? Yuh noe whey mi cyaan stan? ah di ooman dem whey wen pikni tell dem sey dem man ah moless dem, dem run dem an tawk bout ah lie dem ah tell pan di man…..Dats y mi wii foreva sey dis….OOMAN FI BE INDEPENDENT, caw nuff ah dem ah chue dem affi depen pon di man mek dem cyaan hopen dem mout an sey ‘ah’….While some juss plain friggin chuppid and lub man more dan demself….
Skeptic anuh mi she tell dat.. is her dawta my cousin weh did see weh d man a do…..
Mi nah lie, wen mi read di story it mek mi hawt bleed…..How can a man molest a 5yo?…..dem shudda chop off him friggin hood…..like I said in a previous post, it just makes me appreciate my childhood more…..neva noe bout dem sinting yah an how ppl can soh evil till mi tun big smaddy…..I remember after leaving college, I was told the story of one of my former high school classmates and how she was molested by her stepfather… I found it hard to believe, not because I doubted the person, but because I never knew those things existed…..guess… Read more »
Howdy do all…..I MANIAC promise to behave for the next 3 hrs on this site…..haffi tek it in stages, cyaan promise nuh more dan dat fi now
GG, is ppl like dem mek those dutty man continue with them perversion…f*#king dumb! bout u must a dream..kmt
This story is so sad i’m in tears, witnessing your mom getting shot! no-one should have to go through that much in one lifetime. But on the bright side, you’re a true survivor and a very strong person, it can only get better sweetheart..
wow… i can relate to this story…. my auntie did have a amn and every nite him come in the room to touch mi.. when mi tell mi mother and she confront mi auntie.. cawz mi cuzn did see and mi mother ask mi cuzn weh she see when mi cuzn tell her yuh kno weh mi auntie tell mi cuzn.. mine a dream she did a dream
thats how it is when eva you tell them something there dnt wna believe it and till sumthing worst happen