Inspiration

A TRUE FRIEND RE-POSTED

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I thought this to be a good topic to re-post, and I want to ask all bloggers who come on today to give a  story about a friendship good or bad, perhaps your own experience or one that you know genuinely of. Let me take a walk in your world today,as I read your tale,and also  please give your perspective, opinions or wisdom on friendships and what they mean and how they should be.

 

What is required to make a friend ship work in your opinion, one which is based on trust, love and loyalty, are these qualities the ones we should base our friendships on? Is there such a thing as a good friend? Is there?

 

I was born in the month of April, and in Chinese New Year I was born in the year of the Horse, ironically the Horse in Chinese Zodiac occupies the seventh position, as do the Odu Ifa Obara Meji occupies the seventh position in the unalterable order of Odu Ifa. One of the online explanations of the qualities of a Horse is this;

 

People born in a year of the Horse have a pleasant, amiable, easy-going disposition. With good humor and geniality, they are extremely comfortable to get along with, as they have the ability of instantly putting people at their ease.

Horses are very quick-witted and are right in there with you before you have had the chance to finish what you were saying; they are on to the thought in your mind even before you’ve expressed it. All these guarantee their popularity and a large following of friends.

 

I do agree with what is written here of my character, yet I have never in my life while growing up be able to have a friend, one who is compatible with me, (until I made this blog, now you all have gone beyond friendship to me, you are family, and this is so because we have like minds). In my real life I am extremely funny, I tell jokes without even trying, my personality is winsome, and I love people. I would want to be my friend, but while traveling along life’s way as I made a friend, after a while and with no quarrel they would go. One woman even told me that I “See” too much. It took years for me to figure out that I was older, way older than most people who I met (spiritually older), and they did not feel up to “Par” with me, as they felt that I was very deep.

Some did not understand what they felt around me, the energy I exuded, Unbeknownst to me was too much for them. I had no idea that it wasn’t me Obara Meji,but my spirit, which is my higher self. They felt something, not knowing what, and so they ran. I have come to realize that I can only have friend who are spiritual and are awake or on becoming awake, the rest of the world who are sleeping are puzzled by my essence/presence. Now that I have realized this, I have accepted it. More on this in another post.

The re-post is below;

 

The subject of a true friend is touchy for me, because I have NEVER had one. I have always wondered why, and even have cried and lamented about it. It always seems to me that even while growing up, as soon as I made a new friend something would come up and we would separate. It was not until I embraced my spirituality that I realized that my Eguns (ancestors), and my spiritual guides were the ones protecting me from I was a wee babe, from untrustworthy people, deceptive individuals. I was marked for spirituality, (to become a spiritualist), before I came into the world and as such could not have certain characters as friends. With age brings wisdom, and I have come to realize that it is for the benefit of me why some people are removed from my life. The woman I wrote about in yesterdays post, I had hoped could have been a friend, but my astral mates made her reveal herself quickly to me. I still like her and will pray for her, but I must thank them for that revelation. For all those who have experienced good and true friendship, I Obara Meji say HOOORAYYY for you!!!. it is good when you have found people that will always be there for you through thick and thin. You must do all you can to uphold this friendship and pray fervently that nothing bad EVER enters the relationship, because PRAYER works, and GOOD FRIENDS ARE HARD TO FIND!!.

 

Here on Embracing Spirituality, the focus is to share as much as I know with you how to understand if even just a little all things that are spiritual, and why. How they manifest through any and everything in our lives. How to recognize the messages that are being sent to us through the many avenues and channels provided to us by the Universe. Often times our messages comes to us through people that we know, or  family members, mentors, or people who we randomly meet. Sometimes people that we randomly meet becomes our good friends and can often times become a blessing as well as a curse in our lives, if only we relax and watch the signs that will show itself up real quickly. Now you would wonder why would the Universe send you a bad person in your life, the answer is simple. Bad experiences even if it cost death or destruction comes to teach, not only the victim but the world!. It is difficult to understand I know,  but that is the truth!. For instance, a child is kidnapped, and found murdered, the country is outraged and disgusted that someone could do this. What eventually comes out of this is that a new law is made to protect the children of our land, Read the Post titled DEATH PART 1!, and you will realize that death does not exist!.

Often times we have a friend who we believe is true, real and genuine. Sometimes we have been with them for  a while, possibly since Kindergarten. Life becomes good for you and suddenly that friend becomes your worse enemy. Or you marry and begin your life with your lovely husband or wife, seeding up a couple of children and the friend withdraws from you and all of a sudden they are out of your life. The possibility of jealously is there, Jealous because you got married perhaps, or jealous because you are no longer free to roam the streets with them, whatever the case maybe. There is also the friend who suffers from SCHADENFREUDE, who is happy when problems enters the marriage or when the boss threatens to fire you!. When you bring all your hurt and pain to them they secretly rejoice at your hurt. Wasn’t Judas a friend?, What was Brutus to Caesar?, Peter denied Christ. Oh Oprah such serendipity when you found Gayle!!.

Good friend is better than gold someone said and how true is that, but does that really exist?, and I Obara Meji who is asking this question should very well introspect, to see if I am truly a good friend myself. It all boils down to compatibility. We should choose our friends I believe, on the basis of the energy that person brings into our lives. For example, If you are a weak person then you should look for a strong and determined friend, who will give you the inspiration to learn your strength weak person then you should look for a strong and determined friend, who will give you the inspiration to learn your strength and that will be by example, do not get me wrong, because there will be the strong ones who will try to exert power over you which will cause you to run. This strength of character should be also filled with love and compassion. Opposites attracts and I believe that to be true.  There maybe personality traits missing in someone but they find themselves in another who has that missing link and the relationship works because you understand them, and they understand you. Incredible but true. Friendship begins with the heart, and it should be cherished, because we all need each other and no man is an Island. Respect and communication should be the root of all friendship and those two will, bring along trust. Whenever you have a friend, inquire through prayer or meditation what has this person brought into my life, how will their energy assist me to evolve. What contribution do we have to give each other, is this friendship a waste of time. The answer to the latter should be no, because nothing happens by chance, so you have met that person for a reason, the wisdom here is for you to calmly examine their purpose around you!. Oprah says of Gayle, that she is very truthful to her, and that Gayle is happy for Oprah more than Oprah is for herself whenever Oprah achieves anything in life!. Oprah has recognized Gayle’s purpose in her life and that has forged and unbreakable bond. It is time to use your spirit of discernment and look for answers, we all have that innate ability. USE IT!!.

Òní kò lè ba àná jẹ́, ọ̀la kò sì lè ba òní jẹ́, ṣùgbọ́n ìbàjẹ́ ọ̀la, ọwọ́ òní ló wà. /
Today can’t destroy yesterday and tomorrow can’t destroy today, but the destruction of tomorrow is in the hands of today…..Yoruba Proverb!

[Act wisely; don’t sacrifice the future for the present]

 

Everything comes when it must, and everything happens for a reason, do not hurry your life, what is destined for you, cannot escape you, just keep the faith, be patient and be prayerful, filled with compassion, kindness and respect for all, let these qualities be among your name, God will fill in the rest…..Obara Meji!

 

All religions are valid as long as it teaches peace and love….Obara Meji

There are no disappointments in life, only lessons learned!….Obara Meji

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Obara Meji

Obara Meji is a spiritualist, Ifa-Orisa practitioner, and teacher of metaphysics. Since 2011 she has used her online platform to share her personal experiences to those seeking answers about spirituality. Her teachings will expand into short stories, novels, and public speaking to continue her mission of bringing enlightenment to the world.

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SeaQueen
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SeaQueen

Good afternoon, my dears. This is a great topic. See teach you have gems from the past, yuh nuh haffi beat up yuh fingas ah type for us to have an interesting read. To be honest I have ppl I call my really good friends but at the same time i feel like i have no friends at all. Being the youngest of 4 girls, i grew up with my mother drilling into our heads that your sisters are your best friends. So while growing up we were very close as our mother kept us sheltered from outsiders. All though we were close i still felt as if i was an outsider, as my 2 sisters before me were closer and our oldest sister is a few years older than us. Mainly I kept to myself. I had a few school friends, but those ended with the common story of growing up and apart. I have always been the type of friend to listen and be very careful of ppl’s feelings in regards to passing judgement. The male friends I have (to which i have more than female), most of them have had less than friendly feelings towards me at some point during our friendships. Making it hard for me to trust that they are being a true friend and not having an ulterior motive. I have been betrayed by those closest to me, my sisters, and sometimes it makes you feel like if you can’t trust your own blood, who you grew up with your whole life who can you trust. I have always thought it easier to be by myself. Typing this I am sad because I feel even if i did/do have a true friend my trust issues might get in the way. My sad reality. Love and light my dears!

grenville norville
Blogger
grenville norville

I am from Barbados west indies,I am looking to meet those who are Evolved souls. I am VIRGO by birth, I really want to meet spiritual people from anywhere, (NOT interested in a love relationship, those of you who e-mail me will do as destiny leads.

grenville norville
Blogger
grenville norville

I am concious that I came , & we come for a divine purpose into this world ,some of us at a very young age feel the inclination to move in a spiritual direction, I met my soul mate at a party ,the essense is, we must be in vibratory association with the universe ,our thoughts are living things, & are magnectic we will attrack what we think, there is action & reaction(STRIVE to be the BEST you can be, & learn to forgive others& shun those who we know want to hurt us.thats all for now LOVE Greg bye.

MTH
Blogger
MTH

Good morning all. Joining class late, but what a good tutorial. What I love here, is the genuine love and friendship we share. I have been blessed to have had some real good friends and I have been a real good friend to people. However, I have thing about me, I am very friendly, but at the end of the day, no one is my real friend. I have instances where ‘friends’ do not understand me. I am perhaps the only girl in the world who loves to shop by myself. I like being by myself and its not selfishness (to dat), it just the way I grew. Have a great day. Nuff love and admiration to you my fambo.

Cher
Blogger
Cher

Obara, there used to be a center on East Fordham Road that they could walk into. They also have a program for seniors.

KB
Blogger
KB

Hello all my frens Obara, CB, YW, Ty, Joy, Nunu, AMH, Carolyn, Toy, Cher.

Ty
Blogger
Ty

Hailings my sister Kb…

amh
Blogger
amh

Lovery qand light kb

shana
Blogger
shana

Wow! I have one True friend! We have been friend for 15years. If she ever left me here on this earth by myself I would go straight into depression. Our friendship is the best. Its not the kind of friendship where we do everything together. I barley see her because she busy and so am I. We keep in contact by text message and calls and lunch time eating. We always lift each other up. We have had our ups and downs but we still remain friends. I owe her so much. I want to slap her sometimes(lol) but at the end of the day she is my Best Friend!

KB
Blogger
KB

Night Shana

ty
Blogger
ty

So sorry to hear…. i do not know anyone there or that system…

Spiritual Seeker
Blogger
Spiritual Seeker

Good afternoon everyone!

It’s true that friendship is better than pocket money. There have been times in my life that the goodness and mercy of true friends have really saved me. So I’m grateful for those. I think the older we get, we see that good friendships are about quality more so than quantity. When I was a kid I wanted to be popular with everyone and for everyone to like me. The older I get I learn that it’s not everyone who is meant to be your friend and it’s better to have those one or two really close confidantes who ride or die for you and accept and love you unconditionally for who you are and treat you like family. Also, the older you get you see how many friendships (even the die hard good ones) are in your life for just a season. They are there for you for a time and for you to experience certain things together, but then as life would have it, for whatever reason you may grow apart or just take different paths. I can’t tell you how many close, close friendships I’ve had like that. I often really miss those friendships and wish to be in touch again, but it never really works out. But it’s ok because I still appreciate having had them in my life for the time that they were there and for the experiences we shared and lessons learned together. Just like I know they were there for a reason, I know we probably separated for a reason. Sometimes that’s life. I always think fondly of those soul sisters/brothers and wish them the best. As we grow, our needs may change and we often attract the energy we reflect. So as we grow, we will attract different people and energies in our lives. Not necessarily anyone’s fault or anyone’s bad intentions to blame.

Anyway, I’m happy to have “met” all the ES bloggers here and let us continue to share the gift of friendship in whatever way that manifests.

Love and light to you all.

KB
Blogger
KB

Thank u my fren, SS. My sentiments exactly…very well explained. I miss those friendships at times but i have learned like u that it mustve been for a season.

joy
Blogger
joy

Good day Obara and good day to all the blogger I have been reading this post anyway my thing is I can’t ever keep a friend the moment I have someone in my life and take them far my friend they take me far granted they start to use me far what I can do far them the moment I put down my foot I am not a good person I am only far my self and all sort of things far me to find a good friend in this life time it must be a god sent person it hard to find a good friend in this life time

Alicia
Member
Alicia

Thank you all for the love.

amh
Blogger
amh

Good morning everyone!
I think Nunu and I share a real friend. He will tell anyone who asks that she is he best friend and it is the most wonderful experience to witness them interacting.
He is the only one who REALLY knows me. I have two very close friends that I have been friends with since childhood and while they know a lot of my history, they fulfill different roles within my life. At times I feel guilty for not showing them my whole self because they seem to hold nothing back from me but I have always had small aspects of myself that I thought were only for me, only for me to deal with, or only for me to carry the burden of (until C came along).
Don’t get me wrong I will use the word friend very losely at times for the sake of being succinct, but I do not have a large circle of true friends and that is perfect for me.

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Greetings AM H. Why are you H? Hmmm, A. No. Ahhhhh, M. Never mind. It is a treasure to be able to share the burdens of two people within one relationship. It is a gift to find and give acceptance to each other. If you have that, always protect it because such a thing is precious and valuable. Love and light to you and the fam.

AMH
Blogger
AMH

Love and light YW. Thank you for the encouragement, I completely agree, it is not something I take for granted nor will I ever dash it away.

Toy
Member

Real friends don’t judge you and don’t spread your business to people.

Alicia
Member
Alicia

Good day to all; I felt like I was Reading a part of my biography; I too had many ” friends” removed from my life and I thought it was me not being able to maintain a friendship; I have experience most of what is written in the blog; but I .caught the realization of myself and who I am and it took a while but I accept it. Sometimes it can be very lonely but this is my path and God knows what he knows for my life. Friendship is a sacred part of all life; everyone knows the values contained its the sustaining and maintaining that requires all the love you have within..

NuNu
Blogger

That’s true Lady of the Nile some friendships are even stronger than family bonds

Toy
Member

Lady Nile love it!

Yw
Blogger
Yw

LON (Lady of the Nile), what difficult but amazing journey… I have a friend that occasionally says that life is full of teachers (if unno doan guess yet, it Obara). The good thing about the challenges or negative experiences we have with others is that it hopefully clarifies what we are looking for and want. It may even help to give us a better understanding of who we are. Love and light to you LON!!

Cher
Blogger
Cher

Sorry for the typos my phone change the spelling of the words.

NuNu
Blogger

Good afternoon Cher and Lady Nile. Cher your friend forgot that your purse was supposedly stolen, bout she found it in her things lol

Cher
Blogger
Cher

Hello everyone, I too have no real friends, they call me their friends but I cannot honestly say they are my friends. I go above and beyond for people, but when it comes to me no one truly there for me. I have 6 sisters and 3 brothers. I get along with everyone but they just cannot stand the sight of me for anything. I am boasty, show off, etc….. I am so easy going and down to earth. When to a prominent high School in Jamaica all girls school, that was hell, girls just did not like me. The boys however did. Migrated with one girl when were teenagers, I took her for my best friend, we were at Disney World in Florida, I have only $50 US spending money she stole my purse even my birth paper and other important documents. I cried do hard to her about someone stealing my pocket book, she never said a word. Years later we were both living in New York, I went to see her at a beauty parlor she was working and she gave my birth paper that she found it in her stuff. I was so shocked that it was her who stole my pocket book. ( Thank God) I somehow had higher powers looking out for me to have her give me my important documents. Had many other experiences. Ran into another girl I went to high school with daily sharing my lunch, travel from school daily. She came to New York kept searching for me she told me, until she finally called Jamaica and got my number in New York from my brother in Jamaica. I was so excited to hear from her and that she was in NY. Went to see her, she and her husband came from JA together. The husband said to her I did not know you have such nice people as friends, he the husband was leaving the house and he said I feel so good talking to you, please be here when I get back. She never said another word to me from that day( I had my own relationship) I called her many times she would just say hi and tell me she’s busy. Had an argument with my husband of many years how naive he was to think that everybody at his job or our neigbours was his friends, he said yes they were. I was jealous of him because I have no friends. I said to him the people u called friends I would rather stay lonely if that’s what friendship was about. I could go on and on. To Obara and everyone on this blog for the first time in my life I felt genuine love and a sense of belonging! Thanks. I was so lonely one day typed in something and found this site.

Toy
Member

Cher I understand you on do many levels. I know how it feels trust me. We are glad you here and part of the family.

Toy
Member

So

Yw
Blogger
Yw

So, so suck yuh toe all the way to Mexico. Sorry Toy, could not help myself. Darn NCS.

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Cher, ESP is loaded with love. It is a great space to laugh, think, laugh, share, laugh, learn, laugh….well, you get the picture. It is also a reminder to all its participants (seen and unseen) that you are loved and the importance of centering. Love and light you Cherie.

NuNu
Blogger

Good morning brother Yw greetings and salutations lol. It’s true being honest with yourself is not as easy as it sounds.Dealing with the ego is a challenge because it’s easier to the mind and for the self to see someone else’s wrongdoing and faults. Dealing with yourself is so much harder because you’ll always for the most part be biased, “Of course I am right!”. Now I try to ask myself the questions why did I think the way I do about that situation or that person? Why do you think your response is better or your understanding is so much better? Lawd Yw cho man! Lol ok, Now I’m thinking is it possible to be honest and say what you really mean and want to say? Maybe not totally, drat!!! Thanks alot Yw…..

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Never a problem, Newns :). I will be honest with you about you (brace yourself): One of the most admirable qualities about you that comes through even via online interaction is that you try. That is an amazing quality because it takes effort and hard work to try. I know that you are assessing and evaluating yourself and that always poses challenges but what a beautiful thing to be able to truly and honestly say “This is who I AM and I AM happy with that”. It is through this process that you define your value and your worth.
I wish for you the very best and offer love and light to you always.

NuNu
Blogger

Jeez, thanks Yw! : )

Toy
Member

Morning everyone, I don’t think I can call them really friends, because the person I am to them they could never be to me. It has been like that all my life.

NuNu
Blogger

Yail up Toy!

Toy
Member

Hey Nunu!

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Good – NO, GREAT morning Obara Meji and the ESP fambo and crew. Friend…friendship…what are these words? What do they mean? I have absolutely no idea. I suffer from a mental condition (it is called socially non-conforming syndrome – NCS) that makes it difficult for me to maintain bonds with people. I can talk to any person once or twice but to maintain lasting contact is an anomaly to me.
Perception is a beast and how do we convey to another what we want/need and balance that against fear of seeming weak or being taken advantage of or ideas on burdening the other with OUR concerns? Throughout my journey, the theme of no man (rather, person) is an island has always seemed to come up and I wonder……ahhhh yes, there it is:
A friend, to me, is someone who I could lean on without fear of being judged, taken advantage of, or left to fall when I expected a shoulder to be there. A friend wishes the best for another and will council them as such even if it means change between the two. A friend gives love. We can all find a friend but friendship is a lot more challenging because it requires reciprocation and that involves compromise, self-evaluation, honesty, respect, and work – first individually, then between the two. Then again, that may be too demanding or too intense. It is all a matter of what resonates with you.
Obara, Obara Meji, OM we all swim at different depths of the sea. The deeper we dive and operate the more lonely it seems to get. I thank you, Obara Meji, for ESP and I thank all the regulars and irregulars that I have come to know, enjoy, share with, and care for (in some way or the other). I give you all love and wish the best for you all….

NuNu
Blogger

Good morning Charlotte,Ty and Carolyn and all ES massive and crew. Well most of you my brother is my good friend too, a mi paadi dat! I don’t really have friends I just never made any connections with anybody, I do try to reach out to people but they don’t reach back or to be honest some folks I do avoid because of embarrassment. I think a true friend should be able to be honest without being hurtful and a shoulder to lean on during hard times. Real friends are happy for each others success not jealous or as wi would seh badmine

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Morning Newns: “..a true friend should be able to be honest without being hurtful..” That is the challenge, in my opinion, Newns. It is easy to say that we want honesty but many times true honesty hurts. If we cannot be honest with our self, then there is no way for us to accept honesty from another. What you think?

Toy
Member

Absolutely! Yw what’s up

Yw
Blogger
Yw

TOY, me is ‘ere!!! Love and light, my friend (yuh si how nice that go wid the post?) heehee.

Carolyn Warren
Blogger
Carolyn Warren

I am an only child and I have no luck with friends so I do not have any really good friends I have acquaintances or persons who I like. Whenever I get close to someone something always happens to break up the friendship and make me look like a horrible person. People always like me but then as soon as it becomes obvious that they really admire and want to be good friends with me something always happens and it does not work out.

Ty
Blogger
Ty

let me tell you the story of a childhood friend… i met her when I was 3 when my family moved to a particular town…we were neighbors and the same age…for many years we did lots together…when we went to high school, she became interested in boys in 1st form, i was not…we drifted because of this and she called me immature…no malice…just never as close… when my parents left the island, i was living in another town, she knew that I was alone, she never called…one day out of loneliness, I called her and she gave me attitude…hence my last call to her…about 3 years later, we ran into each other, she was with her new boyfirend…a guy i did not know…he kept looking at me…I was so happy to see her that I did not even pay him any mind…do you know she cursed me out because her man was looking at me?….that was the last I saw her…and hopeful will remain so…

NuNu
Blogger

Lol Ty di mata ting serious ie nuh! A suh yuh know a friend fi true lol. I hate when women do that get mad at you for the dude’s wondering eye.

Ty
Blogger
Ty

For all who have had the pleasure of great friends.. I say kudos to you…

I have had good teachers in my path…they have taught me about my strengths and weakness, so I am grateful to all ….

If I were to have a friend, I would want one that I can lean on in hard and good times…someone who would be honest wid me and tell me mata inna me eye…someone I could be happy for in all their accomplishments and who likewise would be happy for me in mine…

Ty
Blogger
Ty

morning everyone…

Obara like you, I am friendless…I am an only child and always seeked to be friends with others…however, I have been the brunt of their envy, jealousy and have been used many a times…

I stick to myself now…me my family and my ESP spiritual family….

I am now trying to connect to my higher self and being the best version of me…so if earthly friends come along then, so be it…if not that is ok…I am rolling with my posse and crew….

Charlotte Brown
Blogger
Charlotte Brown

I am the most blessed person to have seven (7), yes 7 best friends. 2 have been my friend since childhood 3rd grade—-that is a 63 year friendship. To be honest, I am the one who holds the glue to the relationships. I remind my friends that you have to be one to have one. I allow them to be who they are even when I’m not liking the personality or the competition that I see. But, we love, respect and have encouraged each other to succeed over the past 50 years. All but one has a higher degree—-3 are also ministers in different denominations – only one just moved to where I live. I think just “being there” for the relationships, births, marital problems, life problems– through the good and bad. One of my besties is also a Spiritualist – we have been friends since 8years old. But we fell out for a number of years and reconnected understanding that we are really sisters. My saying, “it is by blood that we are sisters but true hearts that we are friends.” If anyone needs, I am there. If anyone has, we all have. We roll as a beautiful tapestry of beautiful women – and this is true all of them are good looking women and smart, good dresses, faithful, and loving to all. Beautiful inside and out. This is how I feel about you all. Your honesty and love for Obara comes through. May you have the blessings of friends forever.
Charlotte

Yw
Blogger
Yw

Ms/Mrs. Brown, wow 7, very nice. I have to ask your opinion on something that I wonder about, though: Do you think that there has been a shift in the value system of our society that makes it mare difficult for true friendships to form? I only ask you because you dated yourself as my elder and I am curious about ideas of values eroding or the world being always the same. In any event, thank you for the blessings and may they return to you intensified. Love and Light!!

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