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BAD ANCESTORS – DO I VENERATE THEM?

The subject of death is scary to most people. It is a topic I have explored here on this site more than once, but have had comments which showed an unwillingness to venture deeper into the subject. When I was a child I feared death as I think most people do. I could never understand how some people took their lives or lived their life in such a risky way that death was sure to find them. The greatest thing that happened to me was when it became time for me to wake up.

Up until then I really believed death was final. Christian people would preach in church, “Where the tree falls there shall it lie, judgement shall find it same place,” and they (de Jamaican Pastor dem whey love frighten people an mek big ooman (me) roun ah back ah bawl) with the Bible in hand would shout “Oonuh stop it! bout duppy and dead can come back, whey de tree fall, ah deh so it ah tan fi eternity until de day ah judgement!” and the congregation would cry “Amen!”

In my mind I saw oblivion. Nothing. Death was final. But then I saw Jesus who rose on the third day, and when the disciples saw him, they were astounded (nuh duppy form him did inna?). Thomas (mi bredrin who doubtful like me) asked him to see his hand, he wanted to see the nail holes and touch them in order for him to believe.

I began to doubt Pastor. I began to doubt the Book which contained the word. I did something no good Christian should ever do. I began to question everything I grew to believe.

When I began my journey toward consciousness, it was the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life, to date, the hardest. Clearing out and throwing away all that one has been taught from birth is not an easy thing to do and as I have told you all before it nearly drove my enemy mad (always remember to throw any negative words on to your enemies and away from yourselves). But I came through, still in the land of the sane (if there is such a thing) and doing my work.

One of my greatest discoveries was that there was no death, only the shedding of the physical body and that we as conscious beings in spirit form can still stay connected with our people here on the earth plane, even if we have gone back home or have opted to travel the realms within the Universe. Consciousness has the ability to split itself into many. While I am here typing, someone some where maybe having a dream of me, or having a vision that I am in their room having a conversation with them, healing them or whatever. It is not their imagination, the dream world is real but if my spirit needs to visit someone, unbeknownst to me or the person, we can and will meet, it matters not where we are in the the world or what our physical bodies are doing at that time.

No matter who you are or what your belief is, it is important for you to have an altar. An altar is a sacred space created for your ancestors, which in truth if it were not for them, we would have no idea or concept of God or of our divine source. They are very important to our lives and to our journey. A great entertainer once told me that his career had gone down the drain at one point in his life. He had a divination done and it was told to him by the diviner that he needed to feed his ancestors, but he had to make the feeding great. He did this and wonderful things began to happen to him. He continued to embrace his spirituality, never again neglecting his ancestors. He has now been inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame.

Now what about “bad” ancestors, someone once asked me, do we venerate them?

I had an aunt named Doreen who use to mal-treat me, so when I erect my altar, how do I block her from coming to eat and drink the food I put out for mi nice uncle Milton?

You don’t.

Aunt Doreen, as wicked and evil as she might have been, was wicked and evil when she was alive. She is no more that person, (read this post). When your Doreen died, (hopefully she is not earth bound) her mission while on the earth was finished. She, in the form she now is as a light being, has gone on to greater things within the realms of time and space. Either toward another life (incarnation), or resting with her astral family before venturing off somewhere again. The possibilities of spirit while out of the body is endless. Aunt Doreen, is not the same miserable Doreen you knew.

Now you may say to me, “No Obara yuh wrong. Mi dream har last night ah pinch mi,” and you may indeed wake up with the pinch, your arm being black and blue. When a person dies, although they have gone on to their next life, their essence is left here. Like drinking from a glass and seeing the residue from the drink or smelling the fragrance of what was once inside there. Even if it was water, after you have drained the glass, if you hold it upside down long enough, you will find a drop or two will fall out. So follow me for a bit.

Doreen was wicked but after she died, she went where she was supposed to go; she did not linger on earth and tun duppy. Yet she terrorized the yard day and night. People in the community saw her in odd places (she all show up inna people selfies ah kin teet behind dem). Everyone begins to talk, saying Doreen has not gone anywhere. There is no way she has gone on to rest and people keep seeing her all about town and dung ah de bar ah drink and Mr. Perkins the local taxi man said he picked her up from church and dropped her home yesterday, (ok dah pawt yah ah duppy, but I digress) rub out Mr. Perkins part and focus on what I wrote before him, (keep de selfie).

Doreen’s essence, her residual self, her imprint has been left behind and is kept alive through fear, hatred and just plain talking about her as how she was when she was alive and a terror to all she knew.

Do these evil family members get repercussions for the acts they have committed while alive? Yes and no.
Yes, if the evil actions they performed was detrimental or affects another person in such a negative way that it is hard for that person to recover emotionally or physically. This comes underneath the law of causation.
But no, if the evil act that person performed assists the victim into their next phase of life, into waking them up, or into propelling them forward through to their journey, then there is no repercussion for the wicked because now, that wicked person is no longer a “wicked person,” they are your teacher.
Also know that there will be no judgement for them, only ascension into light and for their astral family because the wickedness that they did helped to propel you forward. perhaps this was a contract made by both of you before you came into physical being.
A mother can mistreat a child and because of this illtreatment the child sought to be a better mother, a better human being, or found their own independence. Regardless of how we saw that evil mother, the Universe smiled at her actions because it made a better human being out of you.

So should you still call her name and pray for her at your altar? Of course you should. Should you keep in your memory the bad things she did to you? It is hard at times to forget or dismiss terror or pure evil suffered at the hands of anybody, but there comes a time when you have to make up your mind and heal. This cannot be done if you allow your mind to constantly re-visit those terrible times (I should know). You all must know that no matter how bad the circumstances or situations, these “bad” ancestors came to take you to another phase of your life.

It is up to you to see the lessons or understand why this happened to you. Only when you search deep through all the pain and sorrow, removing the hurt just for a little while so that you can get the full comprehension of why this woman hated you so much and was so hard on you. Only then will you be able to heal and even perhaps release her. No matter the circumstances, however harsh they were, they came to teach you or you had a debt to pay. Some people pay debts for their family line. They go through life crying why me? But if not you then perhaps your child. Perhaps you suffered a terrible situation to save your own child from the same fate. But if this becomes something that happens to you, your children, and their children then it becomes something deeper and it has to be broken, because the possibility of it being a generational curse is there indeed.

Release Doreen. Put her favourite food on the altar. Set out her rum, put out her favourite flowers, call her name, ring your bell, light a candle for her, and tell her to watch over you and yours. And she will.

Obara Meji

 

Ódi ìgbà tí òjò bá dá kí alágboòrùn tó mọ̀ pé ẹrù lòun gbé. / It’s when the rain subsides that the person with an umbrella will realise it’s a burden…..Yoruba Proverbs!
Whoever is in denial would have to face reality, eventually.

All religions are valid as long as it teaches peace and love…..Obara Meji!

 

There are no disappointments in life, only lessons learned…..Obara Meji!

 

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lovely16
6 years ago

I appreciate this post the most so far in my readings. Thank you for the clarity. Thought of my grandma and the weight she carried with her health, the suffering. But all her children and grand children and great grand children are generally healthy. Made me connect a lot of things. Thank you!

Lucinda
Blogger
Lucinda
7 years ago

Thanks a lot for this story about ancestors. .it made me think a lot about them and what they had done. I had like that question about the bad aunt cause I always wonder about that and u made it so clear. Now u made me feel to do an alet for my ancestors cause I know they will love that..thanks again
Love and light

Mjw87
Blogger
Mjw87
7 years ago

Thank you sistar Obara. I often wondered as to whether I was on the right track by leaving my ancestors favourite foods and drinks on my altar. I do this by following my mind. Although at times I doubt myself. Your article confirmed that I am indeed on point.
Blessings
Mo

SeaQueen
Blogger
SeaQueen
7 years ago

Good morning mums,

Just thinking, maybe if you take care of doreen she will go and pinch somebody else besides you lol…don’t mind me.

On a serious note I have to say I have met with obara in the dream world on a couple occasions. I had to really wake and ask, “wth is obara doing in my dreams??” This is before being active on the blog.

Natalie
Blogger
Natalie
7 years ago

Thanks for this post Ms. Obara e. I can feel my dad presence around me sometimes. When he visits l feel a sense of calm. I know he and grandma are watching over my family.

I don’t have an alter but I pray and ask them to guide me along the way.

CharMD
7 years ago

Thank you Obara for this post. But I’m curious, what about non relatives like and ex boyfriend or girldfriend that did you really dirty. Are they your teachers? Could possibly no harm come to them for their intentional misdeeds? Will they be able to transcend or will karma serve them? I know before coming onto this earthly realm that we chose our family so that we can work out whatever we needed to work out in this lifetime, the people we meet and encounter in our lives is not by accident or coincidental . But it blows my mind that’s… Read more »

Cher
Blogger
Cher
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Wow I love this explanation Obara! I just love learning, you are such a great teacher.

OWASINDA
7 years ago

Ever since I read your first post about ancerstors I always keep them in my prayers and pay my respects even to me uncle who I never had any form of relationship with and my evil great grandmother. Thank you obara for all your lessons and teachings I can’t thank you enough. I tried to do the alter one time and it never worked out. I kept hearing a stern voice saying to take it up. Maybe I did it wrong I dunno. But I’m always hearing that voice of a woman maybe Sheba is my guardian angel I dunno.… Read more »

Intellectual Bhutu
7 years ago

In the last couple months, I’ve gotten photos of my great grand parents and there is an overwhelming urge to set up an altar for them…..need to get that done this weekend ( sarri fi all who aguh seet an ketch dem fraid) This afternoon, as I approached the highway, I got the unction to turn the music off and pray. Mi nah talk “Dear Heavenly Father” prayer, it was a conversation acknowledging the presence of the ancestors in my life – being grateful for their guidance – the doors they opened….and those they closed. At the end, I listened… Read more »

MTH
Blogger
MTH
7 years ago

Greetings one and all. Obara, Teach, if mi love yu one more time. This post is timely and even though you have taught us this before, it resonates within me on a very deep level. I will attest to the part that you wrote, that if one needs you and summon you, then your spirit will go and sit and talk or just serve the person how they need to be served. Back in 2014, when I was blogging for a while with you, I needed you and your spirit visited me. Recently, I was going out of my mind… Read more »

KTB
KTB
7 years ago

O I held resentment, hate and anger towards my father. Never meaning too but it was there under the surface without me really acknowledging it. I would call his name while praying at my altar and 1 day my spirit said talk to him. I did and released stuff I didn’t know was there. Shortly after he visited me one night. I was sleep and woke to him in my room. i woke up good good and sat up in bed. The figure was so clear to me even shape like him with bang belly lol. Just standing against the… Read more »

KTB
KTB
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Nah tell nuh lie tiaad a learn lesson at time kmrt some lesson drain you yu so low yu nuh feel yu ago come back

KTB
KTB
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

I know..

Lover of light
7 years ago

Obara this is one big pill to swollow especially being a baby, spiritually that is. My eyes started tearing up and then I went into full blown bawling. Just memories While reading something strange happen I just felt like stuff was releasing from me and I started understanding things better. I know realize that if the lady who choose to carry me in her womb had been nice to me I would have missed my mark to be awaken. It’s because of her horrible treatment to me I started to search for truth . The place I am now in… Read more »

Nunu
Blogger
Nunu
7 years ago

I like what you said about the mistreated child becoming a better person because of the illtreatment. I remember my grandfather telling us that because of how badly his father treated him, he decided as a child that he’d make sure he’d never mistreat his kids because he didn’t want them to suffer and feel unloved like he did. So his father did him a disservice and service at the same time.

SeaQueen
Blogger
SeaQueen
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

I think it’s just the dynamics of your relationship. The quiet ones show you they need your space so you give it to them and sometimes you give too much space. This reminds me of myself and my eldest. From she was a baby she likes to do her own thing and is always caught up in her own world. Over the years I have learned to give her her space. I find myself being reminded to trouble and play with her to give her that affection and let her know I love her.

Sharon
7 years ago

Dear Obara, it makes such sense the way you tell it that that “wicked” person whom tormented you, didn’t’ love you, was fulfilling a purpose. That is why one must release and move on, don’t forget the lesson and be grateful for the gift of growth and change that was bestowed as you survived the experience. So profound, that teaching has embedded itself in my DNA! Your voice, the way you write, makes everything so palatable and easy to understand, even when it takes me repeated reads. A couple of questions: 1. Is an earthbound spirit still considered an ancestor?… Read more »

Sharon
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Thank you Obara. This post is so timely, I have been struggling with how to protect myself from my mother whom II ran halfway across the world to get away from (even though at the time I did not know I was running). When I have asked her why she did some of the things she did she always responded, “It’s what I knew.” I have never bought that argument and vowed that I would do better. Honestly when Inwas pregnant I was terrified that Inwould have girl. I was blessed with two sons! Lately as I struggle with this… Read more »

Sharon
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

I can do that! Thank you Obara

SeaQueen
Blogger
SeaQueen
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Mums,

May I ask what it means to call them before you spiritually? If you can share, if not I understand. It seems like something that takes a great deal of spiritual elevation.

SeaQueen
Blogger
SeaQueen
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Mums, what would you consider too often? For example, when my grandmother passed I saw her twice. Once immediately after she died and the second a couple years ago. I know she isn’t earthbound because two times in over 10 years isn’t often. But my grandfather used to visit me when he passed often until he kissed me goodbye and after that I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve seen him. But he does visit my mom more, maybe because she misses him a lot sometimes or to warn her of something. Wish they would visit… Read more »

Nunu
Blogger
Nunu
7 years ago

Good afternoon folks! I guess because of the religious conditioning it can be difficult to grasp this knowledge. I find that as I’m learning and figuring stuff out the best thing is not to say anything to anyone because then based on the response you get doubtful and folk start looking at you sideways.

Nunu
Blogger
Nunu
7 years ago
Reply to  Obara Meji

Lol no mi nah sleep! In general. But di chatty, chatty part mi deh tek to heart doe.

Zoe
Blogger
Zoe
7 years ago

I was actually wondering that the other day, not only am i in the “dangerous christian questioning phase” of life but the little i know of my great grandfathers on both sides seem mostly negative in nature. It’s truly a confusing time to be stuck between religion and trying to find the truth

KTB
KTB
7 years ago

Hi Obara I’ve wondered about honoring the bad ancestors but never left them out. Good! They haven’t terrorized me but I had a visit.

1liberatedlady
7 years ago

Well I am sorry but I have to disagree with this one…I had one of my ancestors come into my dreams and tell me basically that they wasn’t going to help me……They were exactly the same spirit in real life….I personally believe that most of the time, however they treated you….or liked or disliked you…it’s still them/ their spirit…..Now I’ve had some of my ancestors who was not so nice, make amends, and showed the desire to start a new relationship….Now that’s possible….but to reaching out to ppl who hated you in their physical form can be dangerous. But I… Read more »

Lincoln
7 years ago

I think people need to get to a higher consciousness and realize when people do us stuff and we suffer it is for us to learn. If one see life as one big exam where some questions will just bat you away but when you revisit it another day, you will know how to solve it. When I hear and see people dwell on people and stuff that happen in their lives I am like oh ok!, then dont make that crap happen again and the next time someone in the some suit comes in your life, at least now… Read more »

KTB
KTB
7 years ago
Reply to  Lincoln

True words Lincoln!

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