WOW-IS ALL I CAN SAY

Good day to you folks and blessings of the Universe and of God to you all! I do not know how exactly to write this post today, because I have so much to say and the topic is very touching for me. It is very hard as an awakened person to see so many people suffer and know how to remove their suffering but cannot say anything, because they would not listen to you but rather condemn you. Allow me to tell you some very personal things. I may over share but who the hell cares!

Last night as I turned the television off and left the parlor, went and brushed my teeth for bed, went into the bedroom where my honey was already asleep, sat and plugged in all our phones to charge in preparation for tomorrow, after which I was about ready to climb between our sheets and snuggle up to him as the room was cold from the A/C, my phone rang. I felt a slight lift of my heart, which is normal for me, I am a mom and my children are in America, so when the phone rings I get that reaction sometimes.

My daughter came on the phone and told me that my junior sister texted her and told her to call me, the message was that my senior sister was hit by a car and her two legs were broken. I shouted at the news which woke my husband, and he startlingly jumped up asking me worriedly what was wrong. I told him and we spoke and he went back to sleep as I sat and stared into space for a while.

They said she had come out of the meat shop and was crossing the road and a car hit her and kept driving. My junior sister spoke to her while she was in the emergency room and she was crying, and according to my junior sister she sounded delirious, she was in pain and she said the car hit her on purpose.

I asked for her number from my junior sister and I got it, I tried to call her but no answer. She was in the emergency room after all with both legs broken so I guess they were attending to her while I attempted to call.

About 3 years ago, one night  two men went up to this same sister’s son, a boy of 28 years, and shot him at close range in the neck leaving him paralyzed from the neck down for life.

I had not spoken to this sister for years, and I had promised that I never would, If you read my posts you will see where I told you all about her and our lives from Jamaica to America. She was the sister who pinched me at nights because people pampered me of my skin color which was no fault of mine, this is how Jamaican people are and I was a child.

They paid no mind to her and she took it as it being my fault because she was dark while I brown skin.  This dislike for me followed us when we came to America. There were times when we got along, I really loved her and I thought she was so beautiful,but the thing she had for me from Jamaica was still there. It was there, she had never released it.

She stabbed me one night while I was a teenager. I was sitting in our living room my back turned when she came up behind me and stabbed me with a screwdriver in my leg, we had argued earlier and I went into the living room to sit, thinking the argument was over. My mother who had began to dislike me for some reason, (I had no idea at the time that she would put things into my mothers head about me, my mother believed and changed her heart toward me, that dislike is there to this day and my father joined my mother in the hatred of me, all because of what this girl did) did not throw her out of the house that night, but I was thrown out because I waited two weeks later to get my revenge on her, by waylaying  her and knocking her out with my mother’s crystal duck which she used to decorate our kitchen table. I was thrown out for about two weeks (I do not really remember how long) the neighbors with whom I had been staying had to beg my mother to let me back home.

This sister and I have had our differences and her two older sons, boys who I took care of, buying them things that their mother refused to buy them, taking them in when she threw them out, grew up and cursed me to my face. The one who got shot called me a witch and an Obeah woman. The sister went on social media and called me a Obeah woman and lambasted my character something fierce. I do not use social media, so it was the junior sister who showed it to me. I was hurt at the horrible things she said, which were all lies, but this was extreme. I even cried.

She had a premature baby who seemed as if he would die, as a matter of fact the doctors told her to prepare her mind. While he was in the hospital battling for his life, she and the father came to see me one Sunday to ask for my help. For my family, I am remembered only of there is a problem, otherwise, I am the JUJU/Obeah queen of the world, and they speak of me with hatred. I helped that small baby and now he is 14 years old, he has Autism but highly functional, a very lovely child.

There was a time I saw him on my block, my sister and I were not speaking, she and her sons (who were living on the second floor of my house and were terrorizing me with loud music day and night, this was the time they cussed me and called me all types of names, all because I would beg them to turn off the music) were my real enemy during this time, but the Autistic son was innocent, so when I saw him I greeted him and he tried to greet me and she pulled him away and scolded him.

Here I was, the evil witch, according to them, just because I was a spiritualist, I was evil in their eyes. I was condemned, lambasted on social media, criticized, cursed at, threaten by the sons who had Mr. Highgrade locked up because they picked a fight with us and High grade defended.

They laughed at me the day the police took Mr. High grade to the station and said “Obeah woman, if you so powerful why yuh man gone jail! They, mother and sons stood outside the hall of the family house where we lived (except the mother she lives in the projects, but she came to help her sons jeer me). The son, who got shot had gotten Mr. High grade a job on a construction site, but the people had layed him off. It was long after the boss saw Mr. High grade on the street and when he was asked, why was he let go, the boss (who is Jamaican) told him that the boy told him not to hire Mr. High grade again because his wife which is me, was a terrible Obeah woman and would obeah him (the boss) for him not to have money. The boy did a number on the lies and stories he spun. I have no idea to this day why these people hate me so much.

I could go on and on about our relationship, but I wanted to show you all the reason why I had made a promise to myself that I would never speak to her again. The junior one and I had always gotten along, but a year ago we had a fight and she joined the senior one and they did some things to me, plotted with my enemies against me,….it pains me to remember all that they did to me.

Anyway, when I heard what happened last night, and I reflected upon what happened to her son and thought about her long and hard. I wanted to reach out to her (I had never had the heart to them as they do to me) and explain to her that her father was a shoe maker and as such he worked with tools, which meant that their family line came from Ogun. I wanted to tell her, that Ogun should be appeased and fast so that all these would not befall them again. I am not saying that Ogun the deity is after them and this is why these things are happening. I am saying that Ogun, God of Iron ans Steel has affected them and it is possible if he is settled and petitioned then the things belonging to him, such as guns, cars, knives and such would no longer affect them. I know the workings of nature and what can affect us and how to prevent all these, but how do you say this to people who condemn and hate you? How?

I wanted to get to her and assure her that all would be well and if theses things were done she would be ok, but I could not. My sister was not a practicing christian. Other than baptizing her children I do not believe she ever went to church, but they know and understand nothing but Church and Jesus, perhaps more, but I would not know that of them, because they would not tell me for fear that I look at them in the same light as they do to me. People like me were to be burned at the stakes, unless THEY have a problem with no solution, then they would crawl at my door and smile and be humble until they found their solution. After which the Condemnation of the Spiritual worker would begin again.

My Bloggers, I swear to you all, I have never been the antagonist to my family or anyone. I am one with the softest most compassionate heart. I cannot bear to see some one suffer. The people who have hurt me the most in life have been my family, my blood relations, (excluding my children). When the wicked baby father did all that he did and I ran to them for help, my mother told me that he should have kicked me in my (P*&%SY). I have forgiven her, how could I not? she is my mother and an elder, she will speak to her God about her behavior to me when the time comes. She may not love me but I must love her. That does not mean that I have to be around her, because I do not visit them and I hardly call.

Recently something happened in my home which could have turned tragic, it did not and for that I thank Orisha, we saw it coming and did our sacrifices, so it was only the breeze that we felt, we saw no devastation, my parents nor this sister never gave a phone call to ask how are my children and I. Nobody gave a damn!

What I tell you here on this blog is the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth.I would not defile anybody’s character for the sake of comments or for a post, never would I do that.

I cannot help but feel sad about what I heard last night, in my minds eye, I see her dancing, she loves to dance. I saw her crying in the hospital last night as my junior sister told me she was, and I wanted to comfort her, even though I had sworn to God that In my life I would never ever speak to her or her children again. O ma se oooo! What can I say, but I ask you all to pray for her speedy and full recovery. What she has done to me, especially ruining any relationship I may have had with my parents, especially my mother whom I adored as a child growing up, one day she will answer to God for that. For now, I forgive her. I will never go to her house, or break bread with her, invite her out or attend any function with her, after her recovery I will stay away as I always have, and remove her phone number from my phone. I will have nothing to do with her, after she has recovered, but I have forgiven her. Forgiveness does not mean I have to speak to you or be in your space, it means to me that all that you have done to me, I no longer hold you in contempt for it, I have no malice in my heart for her. I have forgiven her, I have removed her very existence from my mind. I have walked away from blood family a long time ago, yet I cannot ignore what has befell this woman at this moment, so I must pray for her.

I do not regard her as my sister or even my family member. I am numb to her and her children. But yet I urge you to please pray for her so that she will be well again.

A Jamaican Babalawo once told me that people who come into this world and who are high spiritual people never have the love of family. I have observed it to be so with some remarkable people whom I have met and their story is similar to mine.

There are no disappointments in life only lessons learned!

Ọwọ́ ọmọdé ò tó pẹpẹ, ti àgbàlagbà ò wọ akèrègbè. /
A child’s hand can’t reach the shelf as an elder’s can’t enter a gourd.

[Everyone is crucial; no one can do it all, but together we can do more]

All religions are valid as long as it teaches peace and love…Obara Meji!