I remember once when I lived with the “Wicked Baby Father” while we were having problems which were overwhelming for me (a lot of cheating, lying, and cruel treatment). One night while he slept soundly, I laid awake in the dark contemplating my life. With only a glimmer of moonlight peeping in, I was, as usual, alone in my worries.
I heard a voice speak in the darkness. The voice was my own but the audio did not come from my mouth. It was around Christmas time and Christians around the world had energetically invoked the energy of the Christ consciousness as they do every December. The Christ consciousness was floating all around the world, and New York was no exception. With me being Christian-minded at that time, I was not immune to its visit.
The question I heard my voice ask was: “What can I do to help me and my children?”
The voice that answered told me, “Get up and read your bible now“.
The voice was clear and present and emanated from the air. No way could this be God… could it? I did not imagine it. Being spiritually young and Christian-influenced at the time, I could only call that voice “God”. All the same, I did not know what it was and so I drew my covers over my head and slid closer to the Wicked Baby Father, my eyes darting from left to right in the dark.
When I became spiritually wiser I realized that I indeed got a message that very night to the answer I sought. It told me to read the bible because an energy had been invoked by Christians around the world and it was passing through. I was Christian minded in belief and faith, so it was befitting for me to “read the bible”, as the “voice” knew that that was where my faith laid.
However, the voice I heard was not Jesus or God. It was a divine presence who perhaps was passing through or simply has never left me. I have not figured it out as yet, nor have I searched.
Looking back to the times when I was spiritually and chronologically younger, I realize that there has always been a genderless voice, a presence, that has been with me ever since I can remember. I have written about it here before, and frankly, I become misty eyed when I remember times when I was going through hardships and receiving maltreatment from the Wicked Baby Father, his women, his family, and my own family.
It was this presence/spirit, that would point the way of life, my own life direction to me. He or She is that guide.
We all have our guides that are here with us to guide us along life’s path way, and there are more than one. There are 3 main guides with each of us, and each guide has their own “family”. In other words, a guide that is assigned to you, has many other non-physicals it also travels with to assist your life on Earth.
When I discovered the Yoruba philosophy of Ori, one’s head or inner consciousness, I began to understand that a part from our guides (which are not ancestors, but high non-physical beings), we have an even higher divinity: the Ori. Our Ori can be viewed as our own personal God/creator.
Yes, our Ori is our greatest divinity, assisting us here on earth. It is our higher self. I will write on Ori another time, fascinating subject.
A part from our ancestors we have many different guides who function in different ways in our lives.
There is a special one who I have never seen, and I have no idea if it has masculine or feminine qualities, but it has been with me ever since I can remember. Here is one of many stories I have of this special guide.
I have written about this before but in the interest of this post, it bears repeating.
There was a time when I was under heavy spiritual attack (obeah). I was about 22 years old when an enemy threw a sword (a spiritual blow) at me and in the middle of the night while I slept, something woke me up. The person had no form, but he (although I do not know the gender, I will describe it as “he”) was there close to me in the room. The voice I heard was like an imprint upon my brain.
“Look at the Pole Cat coming,” it said.
I was able to see through my bedroom door and to the balcony which was off my living room, an animal that looked like a mountain lion (not a pole cat at all, but certainly dangerous) had broken the glass door and was stealthily creeping towards my bedroom.
It was then some male forms, as tall as the ceiling, formed a chain around my bed. The animal came into my room and tried to poke its head through the ring of beings that banded together around my bed, and became frustrated when it could not penetrate them to get to me. The animal turned around and left. I watched it walked away, amazed rather than frightened.
The voice then laughed softly and said, “It came as a Pole Cat and now leaves as a Paul Cat.”
This meant that the power the beast had come with had been cut down. The spiritual blow had failed.
This same genderless voice has taught me a lot over time, and I know how to differentiate it from the ancestors, my Egbe (see post on Egbe) or even my Ori. This particular being speaks to me while I sleep, it makes its presence known, but has never allowed me to see it or even recognize it’s voice as masculine or feminine.
If you are a psychiatrist reading this post, to hell with your diagnosis!
Now, I want to introduce you to someone you may never have heard of but they are with you. Someone who is quite familiar with you, although you may not know of their presence in your life. Someone who loves you as much as your God loves you, but you don’t know them. Someone who knows you more that you know yourself.
That someone is You!
Yes, you have a Doppelgänger, a double, here in this world and in a world unknown to you also.
According to the Yorubas, the placenta of a newborn baby must be buried properly with certain leaves and money (though not all Yorubas will do it this way) to ensure that you will have a respectful child. The spirit of the placenta will now go back to “Heaven” (or its abode in the Universe) and guide the child properly.
When a mother has a child, the baby comes out and the the placenta comes after. In our physical world, the placenta’s function to the fetus the mother is carrying is very important. But in the spiritual world, the spirit being attached to the placenta, after the baby is born returns to “Heaven” (i.e. the world where the spirit of the baby comes from) and it watches over the child from there, as its double, it’s twin.
In other words, each and every one of us has s spiritual double. You have yourself here on earth, and another you in the world from whence you came. However, because we have doubles, it also means that in the physical world, if something bitter happens to you, expect something sweet to follow it. If something sweet occurs, also expect something bitter. The baby (sweet) and the placenta (bitter).
Several months ago, I was told through the Ifa oracle that my spiritual twin was angry with me. I was shocked. The Ifa went on to explain that all my life I had always bought everything in two’s and for a while I had stopped. My heart kicked into high speed because Ifa told the truth. All my life I had always bought everything in pairs, and people would criticize me for it or tell me that I was a spendthrift. I had no idea that through my Ori, I was already aware of my twin/spiritual double, and so I took care of her/him/it/what while it protected me, alerted me, and saved me many times. It accompanied me on my journey to the world and then returned to watch over me. I felt elated at finally discovering what I wondered about for years.
Truth be told, I have always felt as if I had a twin, but I told myself it was a fantasy. Spirituality in its prime and potency is so fascinating. All that is happening to us in an invisible world, but is affecting us in the visible and material world is, to me, a wonderment. I see it like a little child looking toward the wintry sky, trying to see if the mythical Saint Nic would be navigating his slay with Rudolph in tow.
During those very difficult years I faced, alone in the world, rejected and maltreated, and afraid of what would become of me, I spent most of my days in tears. I had only small children to live for and no one cared about me. But during those years, a song would play from somewhere within the Universe that only I could hear.
We shall know, as we are known,
Nevermore to walk alone,
In the dawning of the morning
Of that bright and happy day,
We shall know each other better,
When the mists have rolled away.
I cry when ever I remember the days when spirits made themselves known to me through song or otherwise. I may have been unloved and alone in the world, but there were hosts of non-physical beings that loved me deeply.
There were many non-physicals who were around me, but this special double, who was myself in spirit form, I knew not.
With this post, I recognize my spiritual twin, and all my guides. We all have them. It is the first gentle voice that advises us, the strange song that suddenly plays from no where but carries with it a message for us, our dreams and visions and so on.
Listen and you will hear it. Know that it never shouts, it is always gentle.
We all have that special one who is close to us. Watch your shadow, salute it, it is not just a reflection cast through light within the dark.
It is your double, your twin, it is you.
I pray that you recognize yours and give it salutations.
Where a sheep is crying for not having a tooth, a wild boar is crying that it can not cover its own [What one cries for not having, another cries because they have it] – Yoruba Proverb